marriage

Real talk lessons from the first year of marriage

Six months in, amidst the busy chaos of our lives I find myself thinking back to this summer when we were road tripping through a foreign country with nothing but sight seeing on the agenda. I long to have completely full days of her and I. But, like all good things, the honeymoon had to come to an end. I have always read the first year of marriage is the hardest. Together, you work on finding a rhythm and finding your place in their world. The first year is a balancing act and I have learned a few things so far I thought I would share…

Diary of a Divorcee: from grief to reflection to liberation

Diary of a divorcee: from grief to reflection to liberation

I’m also a hopeless romantic and always fantasized that my relationships would be like Ethan Embry and Jennifer Love Hewitt’s in Can’t Hardly Wait. Here I am at 31, a single divorcee — a feeling I truly haven’t experienced since before I was 19. And you know what? It’s liberating…

finding new love and marriage after divorce

Second marriage is not a dirty word: finding new love and marriage after divorce

Divorce is an ugly and catastrophic personal experience. You have to find a way to let go of the past and move forward, learning from what you have been through. The next relationship may be scary, the possibility of finding a happily ever after could be dismal. But finding happiness is worth the risk of letting someone in. I withstood divorce and came out on the other side, so I thought I would give you a few reasons why you shouldn’t give up on love or marriage after divorce…

Adventure vs. settling down: can we make it work when I want to roam and he wants to stay home?

Adventure vs. settling down: can we make it work when I want to roam and he wants to stay home?

My husband and I spent our 20s working short term contracts all over the country. For me every day was an adventure, but it turned out the itinerant life made my husband miserable, so we settled down. But now I’m miserable. The thing is, I still love my husband. We still make each other laugh until neither of us can move. We still have sex. But the quiet life isn’t for me.

So what do we do? Is it possible to be happily married to someone who doesn’t share your life goals? Or do I divorce my best friend?

My husband and I haven’t had sex, not even on our wedding night

I have been married for almost two years now, together for 11 years. But… my husband doesn’t want sex at all — not for the past four years. To clarify: We have not had sex, not even on our wedding night.

I can’t do this anymore. What should I do? Am I wasting my time? I need help.

Advice for being the polyamorous partner to a monogamous spouse

I’m monogamous to my soul. My husband of 21 years recently dropped the Poly bomb. And, I’m sorry poly people, no matter how gently you think you’re approaching it, it still feels like a bomb. But he doesn’t want to lose his family, and God help me, I still love him, so I’m staying. He’ll have his happiness, the girls will have their family and home intact, and I’ll learn to live with it.

That being said, there are some things you can do if your monogamous spouse agrees to open your marriage…

I’m not attracted to my husband: Marriage without chemistry?

I find myself more and more disconnected and not attracted to my husband. And now I’ve gotten to the point where I can’t stand his smell, can’t stand kissing him, all his little mannerisms annoy the hell out of me, I can’t stand him touching me in bed, I put a pillow between us so I can’t smell him… The list goes on. And he is NOT getting what he deserves out of a wife.

However, I have not been true to my feelings or honest with him that being with him has always felt wrong. Until recently…

It’s been six months since leaving my husband for another man…

It has been six months since I left my husband for another man… Six months that I have been paying for my choice through reduced access to my most amazing children ever. Six months that I have been experiencing the utmost happiness, while also experiencing the most gut wrenching guilt. Six months where I have stayed silent on this topic because of the guilt and fear of being judged for what I did.

I’m not staying silent anymore…