A spell of weirdly warm weather got me rummaging around in my little gardening closet, and I stumbled across something that would fill any home gardener with horror. I’d completely forgotten that I had bought a bunch of tulip and hyacinth bulbs late last summer.
And there they were. Starting to push shoots. Well, shit.
Most flower bulbs (heck, even some garlic bulbs) need to experience a period of cold before they’ll bloom. (Science, man.) So you’re supposed to plant them six inches deep in the fall, let them lie dormant all winter long, and ta-da! You’ll have pretty blooms in early spring.
What I did was to shove them in a cold sunroom where I keep all my gardening shit and then forget about them all winter long.
March is usually way too damn early to be planting anything in the Midwest, but here’s what I’m hoping:
I’m hopeful that the sunroom was cold enough to mimic lying dormant in the ground for a few months. And that the frozen ground I just stuck them in won’t kill the fresh shoots. And that if they do come up in late April, they’ll actually bloom.
What do you think, Homies? Are my tulips going to make it?