Dye or dye not: Do you dye your grey hairs?

Guest post by SonyaG
Gray hair don’t care poster by Etsy seller Annickg
I’ve had natural dark brown hair for decades and generally not spending much time or money on my follicles. I’ve reached the point where my grey hairs can no longer be ignored, and I’m feeling very ambivalent about starting to regularly dye them.

My reflection is further muddled with (less practical) thoughts on self-esteem and growing old and other’s opinion of me and superficiality and vain-ness and expectations and ugh! Do you dye your grey hairs? Why or why not?

We’ve talked a lot about aging on Offbeat Home. Because, you guys, I feel like we’ve been doing it together! Which is awesome.

And we’ve talked a lot about hair and identity

But we haven’t combined the two to talk about grey hairs. I don’t have grey hairs on my head yet (although I’ve caught a few in my pubes over the years — the fuck!?) so I can’t answer the dying question ma’self.

But I will say that the thought of having all-over grey hair makes me happy: It’s punk AF, and also, if I wanted to continue to dye my hair non-traditional colors, I wouldn’t have to fucking bleach it first. Total win. Or maybe I’ll hate it, because I hear the texture changes with grey hairs.

So I thought I’d open it up to other Homies: Do you have grey hairs? To dye or not to dye? This is the question and here were some responses…

I have some grey, too. I started getting them around my hair-line when I was in my early 20s! They don’t really bother me though. For now my plan is to let them come and embrace the change. That said, I don’t think it is vain at all to want to cover them! Certainly no more vain than using concealer on a pimple. I’d say whatever makes you feel most comfortable is the way to go! -Kelly

I feel like the mismatched hair is what makes me want to dye it, but I don’t yet – I still pluck. I would not mind all grey, but having random greys stick out all weird and wirey drives me crazy. Another reason I have not been dying my hair is because I am saving the effort for later, when the greys are beyond tweezing, but not yet fully populated (if that ever happens – my family doesn’t really go fully grey). I am planning to dye (maybe even bleach) my hair when I am in my 40’s and 50’s. -ZsaZsa

I am just starting to get a few grey hairs and I am babying they hell out of them. I think they are fabulous, luckily my hair is already curly and I was so proud of the one hair that started out straight and began to curl recently. I decided to just embrace the change and go with it. I think it is because my husband is 14 years older than me, so anything that makes me appear to be a bit more mature is fine by me. I have decided that when I am completely grey I want to dye my hair that light platinum purple color. -Esther

I am almost 50 and just started dying my hair purple. I have been covering grey for 15 years and decided I might as well have some fun. I honestly don’t care what other people think (except my hubby and kids and they love it). I am self-employed and getting to the age that if you don’t have grey showing, you are clearly coloring your hair so why not go Purple! What’s the difference? -Ginger

What do YOU do about grey hairs?

Comments on Dye or dye not: Do you dye your grey hairs?

  1. I haven’t started to get grey hair yet, so I suppose my plan could change. But right now, my plan for grey hair is just to embrace it. I really don’t care if I have grey hair and, after a certain point, I think you reach an age where it’s pretty obvious you must be dying your hair.

    Someone mentioned dying their hair purple. One thing I’m looking forward to in retirement (which is a long ways away) is dying my hair crazy colors. I’ve always wanted blue hair.

  2. I started getting greys this year…I don’t know if it’s just me ageing (I’m thirty-one) or if it was related to stress/trauma. The greys really pop out against my brown. A few of them seem to be congregated in one area, so I’m hoping for a streak, as opposed to an all-over effect. They are a completely different texture than the rest of my hair, so who knows how I’ll handle that. I don’t intend to dye them, although I don’t object to adding some pink or purple to the mix.

  3. I got my first gray hair at 16. My sister, who is six years older, started getting grays around the same time, and we used to search and pluck for each other. Within a few years, she started dying her hair to cover the grays, and I went the opposite track. I watched my sister (and my mom, who also dyed her hair), deal with the cost and annoyance of all the salon appointments, and I didn’t want to deal with that for the next 30 or 40 years. So I just let it go grey naturally. I hadcurly brown hair, so each gray is visible, with a couple bigger streaks during my temples, but I embrace it and think it makes me look interesting and wise! I often get comments about my “beautiful highlights!” I’m 36 now, and my niece tells me my hair is “gray with brown hairs,” not “brown with gray hairs.” I’m still making that mental transition, but I’m grateful that I never had to transition out of dying it.

  4. I love my hair in all its changes. When I first started to get gray hairs my husband wrote a song about “streaks of starlight in your night-dark hair”. Then these increased so that now my hair is silver. When I make rope-braids I like to separate the top white layer from the bottom dark layer to make dual-color braids. Eventually it will go from silver to pure moonlight. I don’t see a downside.

    People tell me that I would look younger if I dyed it. That is of no interest to me, personally, any more than any other hallmark of conformity ever was. But what I’d really look like, with my face, is a really burnt-out younger woman. Better the hair should age faster than the face than the other way around!

    Mind you, there are a zillion reasons for altering your hair color. I’ve tried blue-violet, and it was fun! You don’t have to apologize for your choices. But neither do you have to apologize for being you, au natural. Just love who you see in the mirror, and have fun with your look, whatever you decide.

  5. My hair is dark and bleaching is super stressful to it, otherwise I’d dye it silver in a heartbeat. If/when I do go grey, I’ll likely dye it, but only because I dislike distinct roots.

  6. I’m choosing to go gray naturally. I’ve always had really bad self esteem but pregnancy made me marvel at my body changes. Ever since decided to embrace the evolution! Check out the Grombre Instagram page too!

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