Being fat isn’t a sex-life death sentence: how to be body positive in the bedroom
Confession: I was a covers-pulled-up-to-my-chin, lights-off, minimize-jiggling-however-possible lover. I hated my nude body. I used to think somehow that if my partner couldn’t see the parts of me that I didn’t like, (s)he’d magically not know about them. Then, I met a partner who finally called me out on it. That’s the moment I had my great epiphany: Being fat isn’t automatically a sex-life death sentence; it’s SO possible to have mind-blowing sex and be overweight
4 secrets for surviving a long-distance friendship
This March, my best friend packed up her life in Massachusetts, and she, her husband, and their two dogs set off on an adventure to Hawaii. So what do you do when one of your besties moves 5,000 miles away? It took a little while, but over the past several months we’ve figured out some ways to stay connected.
“He’s not my husband, he’s her husband, but we all really want a loan together”: Life as a long-term polyamorist
I have been following the recent stories on polyamorous relationships, both on Offbeat Home and elsewhere, and saying a silent “hallelujah.” I’ve been in a polyfidelitous triad (like a marriage but with three people) for thirteen years, but have never found the strength or the venue to start a larger conversation about long-term polyamorist relationships. But given how long the three of us have been together, I feel like I can offer some useful tidbits of advice and some observations on living a life that exists on the fringes but still in the mainstream.
How to share BDSM with a vanilla partner
I wanted my man to be assertive and to take charge. I wanted to be swept off my feet by our romantic encounters. Malik, however, is a sub. He wanted me to take charge. He wanted me to be commanding, to dominate him. I had no experience with that whatsoever. He wanted to be paddled, blindfolded, gagged. And he wanted to do all of this with me. If your partner wants you to try something new, be it anal play, bondage, role play, ice cubes, or anything else, here are a few tips I learned from exploring the world of BDSM as a vanilla partner.
Conservative family vs. liberal partner: How do you make it work?
It’s 2015, so a liberal Filipino woman dating a white conservative man isn’t so unusual. And our relationship is amazing. Except… while my family has welcomed the man I love with open arms, his family keeps their arms shut. Normally I wouldn’t be too concerned with whether or not people like me. But it’s different when you’re talking about the parents of the man you’re dating.
My divorce made me love my wedding video
Offbeat Bride readers might remember me from this post. That marriage ended two years after our wedding. It took two more years after that for me to revisit my wedding video. I expected to feel pain, but I felt so much joy instead. My wedding video means more to me now than I could ever have anticipated four years ago…
This is what I wish someone would have told me about relationships when I was young
Here’s what I wish a loving older brother or sister figure would have told us (and what I’m passing on to you young Offbeat Homies out there): there is nothing wrong with wanting a casual relationship. Not in your late teens and early twenties, and not even in your late twenties, thirties, forties… you get the idea.
3 good relationship habits we carried over from wedding planning to married life
The wedding is over and it is still leaking into a lot of aspects of our lives. Some of the things I (and my partner) learned and implemented while planning the wedding are going to carry over into married life. Here are three good habits my husband and I have carried over from wedding planning to married life: Stir Fridays, Tasting Tuesdays, and Wedding-Free Wednesdays.