4 reasons this drunken unicorn wine holder wins the internet today #My favorite things#gifts#unicorn#wine May 12 | Megan Finley Horowitz meggyfin I don't know what the best thing about this wine holder is… 1. That Offbeat Homie Amanda sent it to me in an email that said: "Just, this." And the link. 2. That it's called this: "WINE OF SACRED PURITY UNICORN WINE HOLDER KITCHEN DECORATION SCULPTURE STATUE" 3. This Amazon review: I bought this unicorn thinking it would bring luck, joy and rainbows into my home. Instead he just sits there, staring through my soul with his cold black eyes, just daring me to steal his bottle of sweet nectar. Then when I finally get the courage to take the wine all he does is throw judgement my way for days. Every time I pass I get the "oh hey, there goes that thieving wino again" look. By the time I feel I am over the constant judging, he switches up and begins a massive guilt trip. "Why did you take my precious bottle, leaving me lonely here on my back? Now I'm just a poor, pale joke. All the other mystical hooved animals laugh at me." Related Post Check out these Unicorns in Space leggings! Homies, today is my burfday! I thought the best gift I'd get today would be the start of Shark Week (which is my FAVORITE week... Read more Eventually I give in and buy him another bottle so that I can literally put a cork in it, thus starting the cycle all over again. Want a review? Sure it holds the hell out of a bottle of wine. Just be aware of the mind games to come. 4. Or this creepy photo: PRO TIP FOR OFFBEAT BRIDE TYPES WHO MAY BE READING: You can set up a universal registry on Amazon to immediately add weird shit like this to YOUR registry. Setup your wedding registry today What do YOU think is the best thing about this creepy drunken unicorn statue? Join our community! Reporter Name * Reporter Email * Original text Enter the original text here. Edited text* Enter your suggested copyedit here. Notes You can add a note for the editor here. * Required information. Fix Typo Megan Finley Horowitz Megan Finley is the LA-based Offbeat Empire editor. When she's not writing, editing, and sleeping, she's eating, drinking, and geeking. You can snoop into her personal life over on her website Funk in Deep Freeze! @meggyfin @meggyfin PREVIOUS My thoughts about donating eggs changed now that I'M a mom NEXT Gender-bending fashion lines: How to look smashing in men's clothing when you're shaped like a woman Show/Hide comments [ 9 ] I love these things. They're so ridiculous, it works. I bought a rooster one for my mom – I found it because I was desperate to figure out a gift for her, so I typed 2 things she likes into Google at the same time (rooster, wine), saw this masterpiece, and said DONE. She loved it and it's still on her table today! http://www.amazon.com/Rivers-Edge-Painted-Rooster-Bottle/dp/B008AI22AK/ There are a bunch more styles too – zombie, octopus, bear, dogs, etc. But I think the unicorn is my favorite! Reply I clicked on this article thinking "Surely there's only 1 reason and that's summed up in 'Drunken Unicorn'?" I was wrong. Although I would argue that there are 5 reasons – the 4 given here AND the endless amusing comments and conversations that could result from any reference to the drunken unicorn. 3 agree Reply AMEN! Reply Hi Angie! Happy Thursday! How would you feel about receiving this unicorn wine bottle holder as a present? Reply Duh, I meant to forward this post to my friend and replied as a comment instead. Is it Friday yet?! Clearly my brain thinks so! Either way, this unicorn is cute as hell! Reply I have this and it is awesome. It sits on my table and makes me smile every day. There's a dragon version out there. I think I must get it and display them together. Then it will become my new house crest. 3 agree Reply No way!! That's awesome. I can't believe there's a dragon one, and I didn't know!!! Reply anyone else immediately saw gary?? he is a fierce and sassy gay unicorn from my favouritebook of 2015 "the lightning struck heart" by t.j. klune… Reply OMG, I had this in my Amazon cart for a while until I told myself I didn't drink enough to deserve it! I still need it. Reply Join the conversation Cancel Reply Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *Comment Participate in this conversation via emailGet only replies to your comment, the best of the rest, as well as a daily recap of all comments on this post. No more than a few emails daily, which you can reply to/unsubscribe from directly from your inbox. No-drama comment policy Part of what makes the Offbeat Empire different is our commitment to civil, constructive commenting. Make sure you're familiar with our no-drama comment policy.