Remember when I wrote about making friends as a grown-up? I talked about putting the work in, being forward and direct, and making plans — not just talking about making plans! Friendships don’t “just happen.” But sometimes the work that goes into making friends means reaching out to be there for people when they need you. Here’s a story…
People bond by venting. And while negativity is a great social tool — tearing things down together is a shared activity! — it’s just also very, very damaging…
I got the idea to start looking for penpals after reviewing the offbeat hobbies post. Someone said they wrote to the Amish. That is likely rewarding as well, but since I wanted the immediate gratification that only the Internet can bring (and the Amish are not known for being too talkative online), I pulled up Google and asked “how can I make penpals worldwide?” Boom. That easy.
I’m throwing a party that I’ve named “The Pollinator.” The basic idea is that I want to widen my social circle, so the price of admission is that every single attendee bring a guest that I either do not know or do not know well.
I know there are tons of Live Action Role Players (LARPers) out there. How do you find a good group? What should first-timers expect when they go along? Is it cool for us to turn up as a couple? What else should we know about testing the waters here?
Before getting engaged, I also have been pretty shit-terrible about friendship. I’ve fallen out of touch with people I wanted to stay in touch with, I’ve been the kid waiting for an invitation but never proposing, I’ve let fights and misunderstanding end years of friendship. I’ve not always been great about friends. Then I got engaged and moved thousands of miles away from everyone I knew, and had an epiphany about friendships.
As a non-theist pagan, I felt like I was seriously missing out on that fellowship and community that my dad has found at his church. It’s hard to find that when you don’t belong to a mainstream religion. Or if the local branch of the mainstream religion you belong to is full of assholes, because who needs that? But here are the options that may prove helpful if you feel like this is missing from your life.
This past June, I graduated from college and came back home from being out of state for four years. My same-age friends have either moved elsewhere, gotten married and blown me off, or live in different places, so I am constantly spending time by myself or trying to fit into age groups that I can’t fit into. How do I cope or make friends in that awkward, post-college, pre-long-term-plans phase?