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How to navigate your kids through that rigid gender concept phase

Categorizing the world (including based on gender) is a really important developmental phase and one that kids shouldn't be shamed for. However, introducing kids to many incarnations of gender is important. Kids categorizing and gendering items and people is based on what they see around them. I know this phase can be REALLY hard for a lot of gender-bending parents. Here are my tips for getting through this phase…

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"Are you a boy or a girl?" How do you explain gender to a child?

My kiddo is biologically male, but when kids ask him if he's a boy or girl, he says, "I'm me. I'm a person." Kids, however, don't accept this answer and pester him to the point of tears. I don't know how to tell him the difference between boys and girls, or if I want to tell him that there is a difference at all (besides anatomically).

How do you explain gender to a four-year-old?

Finding affordable gender-neutral fashion

We received a question from a reader asking us to find inexpensive gender-neutral fashion:

"I recently have come out as genderfluid, and it's so helpful to see others going through it as well! Any chance of a fashion roundup of affordable gender non-conforming clothes?"

This has proven to be more difficult than anticipated…

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Defying gender binaries with Alok Vaid-Menon — a gender non-conforming writer, performer, & fashion icon

Alok feels that the concepts of masculinity and femininity shouldn't have relevance in this day and age. "We need to be much more colorful, expansive, and precise about what we mean rather than defaulting into ideological catchalls that do more harm than good," he tells me.

Being that Alok is a person of color, I wonder if they feel that ethnicity/race ties into the equation in a meaningful way. Their reply is so profound that I'm still sort of reeling from it…