Telling my Facebook-obsessed family I don’t want photos of my kid online

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Photo by possiede -- Remixed under CC BY 2.0
Photo by possiede — Remixed under CC BY 2.0
As I consider having a kid, one thing I feel very strongly about is not blasting photos of them all over social media. I want my child to first be old enough to choose which photos land on the internet — if any. And by “old enough,” I mean able to make an informed choice as to what goes on the internet — knowing that once its up, it is very hard to undo because it contributes to their social image.

However, my husband’s sibling has photos of their kid ALL OVER THE INTERNET. It seems like everything that kid has ever done has wound up in on online post, in one form or another. Now I feel as though there has been a precedence set by the family, regarding expectations of what ends up online.

Preserving my future child’s privacy and right to choose is something I feel strongly about. But, I don’t even think something like that crosses my share-everything-on-Facebook family members’ minds.

Any advice on how, or when, to broach this subject? I don’t want to become that mom who bites anyone’s head off who posts a photo of my kid on the internet. But I also want people to think before they post. -Katy

What is your best advice for telling social media-obsessed family and friends that you aren’t posting any photos of your kid online?

Comments on Telling my Facebook-obsessed family I don’t want photos of my kid online

  1. So pleased to see an article about this here. I’m currently four months pregnant with our first child and my husband and I feel the same about our child’s privacy…
    However, we had a huge row with my husband’s parents about us not wanting our wedding photos on Facebook. We respectfully asked them not to post any, and to take down the ones they had uploaded despite our polite request not to, and they told us we were ‘acting ashamed’ and just wouldn’t accept our reasoning. Things have been strained since.
    We’re worried about having the same argument again, especially since they’re in the process of helping us financially, and they reacted so poorly to the polite, sensible request about the wedding photos. I’m worried that my in-laws might either ignore our request again or break our trust, or they might hurt their relationship with their son and I.
    It’s really useful reading these comments. Monthly/weekly emails and private dropboxes seem like a good idea, and we might have to work extra hard to keep them sweet for as long as we can.

  2. Guilty! First time grandmother, and I am dying to show her off. What we have done is create a family group for each side of the family. We can share photos in there without them going public. It satisfies everyone.

    However, I wanted a B+W side photo of my sleeping granddaughter as my cover photo. It caused an issue between her parents. My son said I could keep it. I didn’t want to be the cause of any conflict. I removed it, even though my intent was for only a few to see it and for it to be a non-descript photo. Back to family group posting and a lot of texting my friends.

    When it came to the birth announcement, I made sure no one did until the parents did it. I threatened everyone with bodily harm! I felt it was their moment.

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