Unpopular opinion, even for the child-free: I don’t like kids

Guest post by Elle
By: doctorow – CC BY 2.0
By: doctorowCC BY 2.0

I don’t like kids. No, not even your kids. Not even good kids who mind their Ps and Qs, and put away all their toys. I don’t like any of them.

I’m part of a growing group of people who like to call ourselves “child-free” rather than “childless.” For me, the distinction is in the desire: someone who is childless might want children, but for various reasons doesn’t have any, or had children that were taken too soon from them. Someone who is child-free never wants children.

Yes, I am married, and I am still within childbearing age, but I don’t want kids. Not next year, not when we get a house, not ever.

Still, there seems to be some importance placed in the child-free movement to stress “I like kids, they’re just not for me.” “Kids are great as long as I can give them back to their parents.”

I used to be the same way. I’d occasionally babysit and even enjoy sweet moments with friends’ children. But the older I get and the older their kids get, the more I realize kids just get on my nerves.

I’m not even talking about those bad moments all kids have — those meltdowns or tantrums that make even their parents’ skin crawl. I’m talking just regular kid stuff — normal behaviors that any child psychologist would tell you are healthy. I’d say once a kid gets old enough to become their own person, that’s when that kid starts to annoy me.

As more of my friends start reproducing, I grit my teeth with the realization that it means forcing myself through more interminably tiresome growing pains, things that parents embrace as typical childhood milestones. I’m fully aware that I went through these same phases when I was growing up, but that doesn’t stop me from being aggravated.

childfree-poster

I know even reading this, some of you are judging me. That’s okay. I’m not using my real name, and I keep this well-hidden from my friends with children — fully recognizing that it’s my problem, not theirs. I’m not outwardly rude to children, but in my heart I am counting down the moments till I get to have adult-conversations rather than humoring a child.

I’ll fully go against the “good” child-free grain and say it: I’m child-free because I don’t like kids. It might make me a bad person, but I think it’s better for me to realize my aversion now than after having kids out of some misguided attempt to like them.

You can tell me all you want “it’s different when they’re your own,” but I’ll just take your word for it.

Note from Megan: As Offbeat Home’s editor, I’ve written before about being child free. But I’m also one of the rare “child free because I don’t like kids AT ALL” people. Now I’m wondering… anyone else out there part of this under-represented sect of the child-free?

Comments on Unpopular opinion, even for the child-free: I don’t like kids

  1. Those of us who have kids, let’s be honest, they’re kinda assholes/jerks a lot of the time. Just because we love them doesn’t erase the fact that they are rather unpleasant a decent majority of the time. Those that have chosen to be child-free I totally respect your decision (and envy your freedom:) but please don’t NOT hang out with me because I have a child. I know he can be a jerk, but I seriously adore my friendships and our grown up conversations, and I flat out can’t afford to hire a babysitter every time I hang out with my friends. Your tolerance of my child means the world to me, and I totally appreciate that your visits might be shorter than they were pre-mommy days, but for the love of all that is sacred in the world please don’t let our friendship slide (and please bring wine when you visit).

    • I think part of what makes this a touchy issues for the childfree folks is that it’s very easy to become defensive and/or resentful because we are constantly being told we’re wrong. I absolutely understand and respect that you made the decision to become a parent, and that it has changed your life and priorities. But that choice now gives me choices: 1)spend time with you and your child, which makes me unhappy. Or 2) don’t spend time with you and your child, which makes you unhappy.

      And if I choose option 2… I’m the bad guy. I’m in a catch-22 where no matter what, I’m not going to enjoy the outcome. Becoming a parent changes the terms of your relationships. And part of the price of becoming a parent is that you will lose some of them because people don’t like the new terms of service, as it were.

    • Oh I love your empathy. I have spent time with my friends who have kids, and I get along really really well with the (calmer) 6yr old+ set, but with the young ones and babies, I get overwhelmed, utterly overwhelmed and stressed out, bear with it, and when they’re gone, I need to take some time to be alone and de-stress afterwards. There has been the rare baby I’ve enjoyed.. maybe 2 in my life, and I gush to the parent: “Wow, I like your baby! I don’t like babies, but yours? Yours I like! S/he is extraordinary!”

  2. Haha – loving this. I am child free and married. My issue is more specifically that I as a woman should not just like but love kids where as my partner (a dude) is allowed to be indifferent.

    Fun fact Dr Seuss did not have children nor did Juliette Gordon Low (founder of the Girl Scouts). Couldn’t resist throwing this in.

  3. I do have a kid and I think it’s fine that you don’t like kids. In fact, I have a friend who feels as you do. You can like or dislike whoever you want, no need to apologize for that. And I think too, that in your daily life you can arrange to avoid kids (i.e. do adult minded activities, like going to yout job, the gym, hiking adventurously, paragliding, going to bars, the list can go on and on).

    The thing is, why I commented, you sound quite defensive. You shouldn’t, why would you have to like kids? The one thing I want to point out is that many of your friends at some point will have kids. And I do think you should own that, or at least come to terms with it. It means that in the next 10 years or so, your friends and you will sometimes have different priorities. And different interests. That means you could grow apart. Again, I don’t think it’s a big deal (just life, same thing might happen if you’d happen to like kids but treat them wildly differently), but it helps you if you acknowledge that, so that you can have no hard feelings and frustration towards your friends and their kids and at the same time be true to yourself.

  4. This is an important post and a completely valid view to have and to express. I’m also impressed by the number of thoughtful comments that the post has also inspired!

    I don’t think you’re alone in being uncomfortable and aggravated by children. I’m sure it’s obvious that parents get aggravated at their own children, too! In the US in particular there is a tendency to let parenting over-ride all pre-child goals, motivations, and pleasures – exacerbating the problem and making it extra-understandable that many would opt out of parenthood.

    On the other hand, I wonder if discomfort with children may be a symptom of the disconnect we have between a professional/single life and family life. There is not enough balance between these two spheres, and, as a society that doesn’t support affordable childcare, extended parental leave, or public education, we’ve made it obvious that we don’t value community that includes family or children.

    In this culture, many people are left with very little opportunity to interact with children or to see the benefit both personal and social in watching and participating in the growth of the next generation before being asked to take the anti-autonomy hit of having kids of their own. This segregation makes the transition to parenthood terrifying and obscures the fact that, whether you are a person who is naturally drawn to children or not, they are an important integral part of humanity. One that I believe we all bare some responsibility towards just by virtue of the fact the we ourselves were allowed a childhood by a community that cared for us.

    In short, aversion to children is personal and valid, but I think it’s possible that if we as a society could adopt a more extended notion of family that includes those that have and don’t have children, involving the child-free in the process of raising the next generation, all individuals would not only be more comfortable and supported in the roles that they take (whether as parents or not) and, most importantly, the joys of child-rearing, those that allow many parents, care-givers, and friends to see beyond the annoying behaviors children outgrow to the innately beautiful soul underneath, can be enjoyed more easily by those who choose not to have children of their own.

    • I was going to take offence to “they are an important integral part of humanity”, but I like that you expanded upon that with “it’s possible that if we as a society could adopt a more extended notion of family that includes those that have and don’t have children”.

      I wouldn’t want to ever tell someone they’re missing an integral part of humanity (especially if the child-free status did not come by choice), but I can see you meant you want people to be free to have children to care about regardless of whether they “belong” to them.

      However, I don’t know that I see children as being an integral part of every life. In trying to find an apt comparison, I thought of those who identify as asexual and/or aromantic. I might think having relationships are completely integral to life, but my viewpoint obviously does not encompass all of humanity, because ACE individuals exist and find happiness through life without that aspect. I don’t think that which is integral to our lives can be decided upon without at least some degree of relativity.

      Unless you just meant integral to life as in “life will end if we stop having children” in which case disregard my ramblings, because yes of course, that is factual.

  5. My friends all started to have kids and stopped inviting me to almost any thing. I got the occasional ‘lets get a drink with the child free friend for the night’ invites. I don’t get invited to child birthday parties even though all the parents there are(were) my friends. I feel like the woman on Problem Child. Like, I sort of want to have a kid just to have friends again. When I mentioned it to people several said “Oh? I though you dont like kids because you don’t have any”, but nothing changed. I mean, really, being ostracized because I practiced family planning ( and getting a higher education that was a “thing” too)… Fortunately, now Im in Seattle and not surround by moving back home to the small town after college drama.

  6. I’m late to the party but I don’t like children and make no apologies. As to not liking a whole class of people – every murderer, rapist and paedophile is a person and I don’t like them either (and they were all children at one point). I’ve got friends with children and when I see them, I have to see their children too, otherwise I lose a friendship, but I don’t especially like their children and certainly don’t want to spend long amounts of time around them. I am more used to my friends’ children now but if I had a choice, I’d rather not see them.

  7. I don’t think it’s uncommon not to like children, or at least not to like them at certain times when they’re constantly demanding and attention-seeking. I was never allowed to be like that as a child and was one of six siblings. While I might have liked more attention and recognition as a child, I think the lack of it made me objective, independent and self-sufficient.

    I am a bit bowled over by how children are pandered to these days. I firmly believe children need to fit in with adults and not vice-versa. I’ve never wanted children and get stressed, like now, when my sister-in-law is coming to stay with the two young girls who, while adorable in some ways, can scream their heads off if they don’t get what they want and lack privacy awareness; like running into your bedroom when you’ve gone to bed or are lying in bed the morning. So these (infrequent) visits cause me high stress levels.

    But my main point is that no-one in this day in age should be questioning whether they are ‘evil’ or selfish for not liking children. If you don’t have children and you’re used to adult company, children can be incredibly stressful. I have a friend who loves her two girls to bits but openly admits she can’t stand anyone else’s children. Guess what? There’s nothing wrong with that. Live the life you need to lead and try and give children a wide berth if they’re bad for your health.

  8. I think children tie in really well with the whole “It’s okay to not like things (but don’t be a dick about it)” idea.

    I don’t expect anyone to love my son just because I love my son. I don’t expect to constantly gush over his existence- in fact, I’d prefer not to. However, I often hear “I don’t want to hear about people’s kids/ see their photos/ be around them, EVER”. To me… that’s being a dick about it. This is a big part of my life, and it will come up from time to time. I can’t always get a babysitter- partially it’s a monetary thing, and partially because I like being around my kid and miss enough time via school, daycare, etc.

    People keep saying that if you’re a good friend, you’ll leave the kid elsewhere. Otherwise, you don’t value the friendship. To me, if you’re not willing to be around my kid sometimes, then you didn’t value my friendship overmuch. I’ve had friends with partners or family members I couldn’t stand. I still bit my tongue and was polite when they were around, because I valued the friend and the friendship more than my dislike of certain people. Even if someone has an ethical issue with having children (overpopulation is a common one), they can set that aside. I am a pacifist, and have friends in the military. I simply accept that I am not Lord Emperor of the Universal Morality.

    I see often that the child-free are upset that their friends “disappear” after having kids. Being a new parent is physically and emotionally exhausting. I could barely stand for several weeks, and I was running on no sleep. It seems a bit unreasonable to expect much of anything from someone in that state. If you wouldn’t expect it from someone recovering from major surgery, don’t expect it from someone who just gave birth. After a while, the new parents should certainly be able to contact and hang out with friends and loved ones, but the baby will be there. It needs to be close to its parents at this point, and it’s likely asleep anyways. Both sides need to maintain the friendship, but if the child free friend is putting a bunch of unrealistic constraints on the relationship (“Just get a babysitter” comes to mind. Even if one of the 3-4 people I could ask are free, it’s a hassle and an expense that isn’t justified if you’re just going for coffee) then it’s likely to fizzle out.

    What I find interesting is that while the child free say “My friends disappear after having kids”, new parents often say “My friends all disappeared after I had kids”. Likely it’s on both parties. Being a young mom, none of my friends have kids. Some want them one day, some never want any, and some aren’t ready to decide yet. I’ve never asked them to babysit or care for my son, who is now nearly five. I sometimes go out without him, but as a single parent that just isn’t possible all the time.

    The friends who were understanding of this, kind to my son and I, and reasonable? We’re still good friends, and I’m grateful for it. The friends who wanted to use words like “breeder/cow/udders/spawn”, couldn’t be kind to a small child, acted like pregnancy was a horrible moral failure on my part, or kept openly saying things like “I just hate kids, it ruins your body, so gross, loose vagina” etc… are gone, like any other friend who called me names and insulted myself and my family would be. You can go ahead and not like kids, but it’s rude to say that to me and my son. Likewise, I think motivational speaking, militarism, and Dr. Oz are absolutely ridiculous and harmful- but it would be inappropriate to say that to people who work, follow, or dedicate their lives to those things.

  9. I know I’m profoundly late to this conversation, but I just read this article for the first time, and my husband was able to put a very important distinction into words. People assume when you say “I don’t like kids” that you’re making a blanket derogatory statement that is prejudiced against a group. They reference it to “I don’t like this race” or “I’m against this stereotype”. This implies that you hate them and want them all to cease to exist, which isn’t the case. Instead, the correct phrase should be “I don’t like the company of children.”
    In reality, “not liking kids” is kind of like those who don’t like smokers. It’s not that you want all smokers to die or cease to exist, you just choose not to be in their company because you don’t like the things they do. I don’t like the company of children because I do not enjoy it. That isn’t to say there isn’t one or two kids for whom I’ll make an exception, either because I love their parents or they’re VERY different from the rest, but I would not choose to spend time with children the same way I would not choose to spend time around smokers.
    This isn’t a blanket judgement on the group that says they’re all bad, it’s simply a preference of mine. It’s not something that is causing me unhappiness or somehow related to an insecurity, it’s an opinion. It’s the same as saying “I don’t like spending time with whiny people” or “I don’t like the company of sexists”. I’m not condemning them, just stating my preference to not spend time with them. I see no issue with having that kind of opinion.

  10. I am terrified of kids. Babies especially.
    I realize I am young and my perspective might change when I am within the ‘childbearing’ timeline. But I am not that young that you could class me naive. I have been around children and babies enough to realize that I could do without them. It’s not the child’s/babies fault, nor is it mine, I just can’t interact with them for longer than it takes to say ‘goodbye’. The thought of pregnancy, childbirth, and then the years after makes my stomach do continuous back flips, (Don’t get me wrong, I admire all parents with the task they have set themselves and I don’t mean offense by this comment in any way). The thought of a baby or child needing constant care and guidance from me (a girl how has been dragged kicking and screaming into the adult world) is gut wrenching. And recently I’ve been trawling the internet for comfort. Seeing this ‘child-free’ statement whilst being married has given me a little hope as my biggest fear (apart from children) is having to spend my life alone due to my ‘child-free’ wish.
    thank you for anyone who has read my comment, and I would once again like to point out I did not mean to cause offence by any opinion stressed in this statement.

    • A lot of people have asked me if I’m worried about “ending up alone”
      because my husband and I have decided to be child-free. My husband is 8.5 years older than me so the very real possibility exists that I may have a long widow hood. I’m not particularly worried about it. I’m very involved with the community theater world in our area. This group of people is like a second family. I’ve met many widows who stay involved the theater long after their husbands are gone. Recently, we held some benefits for a widower who’s apartment complex was ravaged by a fire. Having this other “family” that’s constantly receiving new members gives me comfort and hope that if I should face a long widowhood I won’t have to go through it alone. Theater is only one example but there are lots of community activities one can get involved with before and after their spouse passes.

      I’ve seen it go the other way too. An aunt of mine was widowed about a year ago and because she and her husband were together 24/7 she is still very lost. I think that’s part of why it’s so important to have friends and interests outside a marriage. That way whoever lives longer is not completely lost when the first passes. This aunt has voiced her regrets about not having children so that she’d “have someone to take care of me.”
      I found that statement to be rather selfish and also impractical. There’s no guarantee that if she’d had children they’d have ended up living close enough or even wanting to take care of her. Children shouldn’t be viewed as potential future caretakers.

  11. I’m so glad to have found this. I used to want a kid, just one of my own, and one adopted. I’ve had the womb-urges several times, but I’ve never been particularly broody. I’ve never ever been one to coo over babies, I find kids interesting from 6years old, onwards. A couple of years ago I said farewell to all hopes of ever having children, due to the requirement of taking a pharmaceutical to help heal me… ie. the drug wouldn’t stop fertility, but would damage the foetus.
    Thing is: now I feel that being pregnant is like a disease, that babies and young kids are an absolute pain-in-the-ass. I still like the 6yr old onwards, and do volunteer work with 12yr olds. But the young kids and babies… get them the hell away from me. My eyes glaze over when people recount stories of young kids and babies. So often I hear horror stories about being a parent, ending with “oh but it’s WORTH IT!”. Gross. I’m actually now grateful to have never had a baby, and that I never will.
    I’ve been wondering what the hell’s wrong with me, am I some sort of evil deviant to feel this way. This article helped. Thank you.

  12. “I’ll fully go against the “good” child-free grain and say it: I’m child-free”: fine, just a little contradictory when at the same time you psot this anonymously. Anyway, I don’t like kids either, although I don’t hate them – maybe that’s another intersting differentiation to discuss.

  13. THANK YOOUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I needed to hear someone else say this. NEEDED to. I read so many articles about not wanting kids, but loving them, but I just don’t. I didn’t even like kids when I WAS a kid lol. I might have my own one day (I hear “it’s different when you have your own” but I doubt it, but that’s a whole other story) but I just do not like children. And it is so amazingly excellent to hear someone else say it!!

  14. Well, children are people right ? So saying that one does not like “children” as a whole seems a bit shocking, I mean it would be like me saying “I don’t like anyone over 50”. How can you “not like” a whole age group ? Not liking some children I understand, just as much as not liking some adults, but not liking the whole population of children is in my opinion similar to not liking old people, or not liking disabled or black people… It just does not make sense !!! Children are as diverse as any other age group (especially because the article mentions them being especially annoying when they “become their own person”…) and starting any conversation with a prejudice that you’re not going to like the person in front of you because of their age, looks, color… just does not appeal to me. I really hope I’m not coming across as judgy, I totally understand people not wanting children and not wanting their friends’ children to be the sole topic of conversation or here at every event or even not liking their friends’ children if they seem spoiled or just not likeable (some adults are not very nice and neither are some children) it is the generalization to all children that surprises me.

    • They may be unique in colour of hair or eyes etc., but all children of a certain age (I’m talking toddlers) have shared traits whether it be temper tantrums or high pitched ear deafening squeals and it’s those traits that irritate me and I have no doubt as I was annoying as hell to some people myself at that age (probably still am at 52!). No, toddlers can’t help it; but I can’t help not liking it. A 50 year old has had those 50 years to become the person they are so are all very different. Once children get to a certain age, I can deal better and there will be some I like and some I don’t like.

      • Very well stated. I was recently at a party at my in-laws and there was a two year old and I just cannot for the life of me understand why they shriek the way they do! It just sends chills down my spine, like nails on a chalk board. I’m not saying I never did that when I was two because I probably did and I probably annoyed people! But like you said I can’t help not liking the noise, the incessant questions, and just the general behavior of small children.

    • Yes it is a prejudice but I feel that way about kids. It is a generalization but at the same time I have thought that about every one I met on an individual basis until I came to the realization that I do not like them period.

      It is not everything about them I dislike though. I have nieces and they are cute sweet kids but when I am just sitting there minding my own business and they come and jump on my back or ask a question that is followed by “but why” after every response it drives me crazy.

      There is something about every kid I meet where I have that feeling of “omg gtf away from me” and I wonder what is so fascinating about kids? My girlfriend is at the point where she is starting to bring it up quite frequently and I know she is making a play for us to have a family some day.

      I asked my brother once what is so great about kids and if he thinks I should have them and he said when he saw his daughter for the first time he instantly fell in love with her, so I think I really can’t understand what is so special unless I have my own. Like the article however, i’ll take his word for it.

      • “There is something about every kid I meet where I have that feeling of “omg gtf away from me””

        I hear this! I can fake it when I have to and I’m not rude or mean to children who I happen to come in contact with but I just don’t like them.
        I’m so very uncomfortable speaking to them and I find them to be quite tiresome and annoying. In my 28 years I have never come across a child that I would voluntarily spend time with. It’s just not part of my make up I guess and I’m fortunate to have found a husband who shares my desire to never have any. If he had wanted a family that would have been an absolute deal breaker for me.

  15. For me, a large portion of “not liking kids” is directly tied to other people’s expectation of MY behavior around children. I shouldn’t curse around them, I’m expected to engage with them and pretend to be interested in their inane questions and behaviors. If they throw tantrums and I make a face, I’m “parent shaming” or whatever. There are so many expectations of how one should behave around children, it makes it completely exhausting and not at all enjoyable for some, including me.

    • This is so true and I’ve never even thought of it before! Thank you for putting that into words. Part of the reason I don’t like children is that I find it very difficult to come down to their level when speaking to them. I tend to speak with them like I would with an adult (that’s how I was always spoken to even as a child) and parents (at least the ones I’ve experienced) are not generally receptive to that.

  16. I can very much relate to this post. I am currently 25 and ever since I can remember I have never liked nor wanted kids. These feelings still have not changed. Not liking kids doesn’t make me a bad person. I do not wish harm upon any child and I think that people who hurt and abuse them are terrible excuses for human beings. I just do not like them and prefer not to be around them but I’m ok if I have to be. I do not plan on having kids and am proud of my decision. For those who like kids, good. For those who don’t, good. No one says you have to like or dislike them. Everyone is different. I’m just one of those people who do not like kids and will not be having any.

  17. children are unevolved adults. That’s why its normal not to “like” them. Theyre almost always in a life or death situation. (don’t run into the street,dont jump up and down while chewing food,dont get in car with stranger) They also don’t shut up. have zero social intelligence. rebel scream cry and protest all reasonable requests that are only for their best interest. without your help theyd die by their own self “nature” and we are aware of that.
    adults do not become children
    children become adults
    the interim is hell.
    they fight it every step of the way.
    that’s not “natural”
    and maybe we are aware of a biological defect in childhood “nature”?
    it goes against it’s own survival when in the animal world a baby pops out and stands up and walks in one day (just one example) they evolve super quick and do not go against it’s own parents.
    even the bible says “children oppress you” one translation says “abuse”
    the children ARE ABUSING the parents as part of the nastiness of human nature (in childhood) that says if I annoy/irritate the HELL out of my own provider he/she will give me what I want.
    how is that a natural biological friend and not an enemy?
    some appeal to the larger collective society to go against their parents! “my mom/dad “hit” me please help” but in a manipulative and lying way. why bother?
    its not “yours” you are sadly mistaken
    it belongs to the collective and is well aware of it. and many of us in the collective are waking up and saying “I don’t want you” “your “kind” because we grew up already. and can see clearly the disease/ahem…”defect” in human nature….its repelling
    one poster above said to try to tolerate what you hate..and gave the worst example
    a child saying “why?” 1000 times a day
    NEES TO SHUT THE FUCK UP OR GET HIT
    guess what? that’s called bad behavior
    bad parenting
    I wasn’t allowed to say why 10000 times a day.thats annoying as fuck to an adult
    they cant get their work done.
    children are NOT to rule the parents even by annoying their ears.
    its simple
    I have a lot more to say but…sigh
    I think you all know.
    your precious crotch goblin can ( and does often enough) grow up to be a rapist/porn watching/woman abusing/pedophile..or whatever….and the mother will still say “that’s my boy! he’s alright” it happens. so maybe us childfree are noticing these things (duh) and wondering whats going on biologically with breeders who choose this . stop calling kids innocent or a clean slate
    theyre basically for all intents and purposes a “retarded adult” being retrained how to function! how to even hold a cup is hard. it gets angry and screams and throws raging tantrums when it drops the cup because even IT knows that’s fucked up. see?

  18. what I see in America is a new thing
    it didn’t exist before
    children even as young as 3-8
    EXPECT YOU to “serve” them and if you don’t they scream and cry
    they expect a full grown adult with an adult mind to get on the floor and “play” with toys all day long
    and if you don’t it punishes you.
    ive seen it and millions have seen it.
    its like theyre demon possessed.
    they EXPECT the parent to obey them in their silly whims and beg more year after year when almost in tears you tell them 1000000 times you HATE to play with toys and why cant they play alone.
    if an adult did what a kid wanted at all times we’d all be homeless and third world . that’s a fact
    (just based on the amount time they want to monopolize)
    I don’t have children and at 45 never will and couldn’t be happier. but this experience comes from babysitting
    the parents are zombies and fully controlled by manipulation I see right through
    believe me your precious little ones abuse you with cunning and smile and wink at me from the side.
    its not a surprise.
    I see this as a biological attack and with a scientific mind I have not only the right to,but the imperative.
    I am protecting myself.
    I do not “like” the nature I see in children but if anyone saw what I saw and liked it then even that adult better stay away from me.
    id say that adult is infected and its too late for them
    or theyre lying for their own agenda
    (societal constructs /economy/having children provides security) that will change

  19. I know of quite a few single women who have chosen not to have kids or theyre grown/women are divorced
    or
    WHATEVER the case may be..our society set it up so the only way a woman could have a place to stay is if she as the childless one did daycare/babysitting
    because she has
    “time”
    that parents do not have
    isn’t that ironic
    anyway
    I bring this up because these childless or otherwise free women (like I said kids grown/out of house/divorced/otherwise childless/GRANDPARENTS) are now seen as a commodity but theyre being abused too
    they feel stuck because the economy/affording your OWN place was never some easy thing..and these “breeders” who are oftentimes your own family members become bullies instantly
    they don’t want you to know they need you
    they make you feel you need them
    so you better watch my kid for this roof over your head
    breeding is a captivity
    its been used by men for centuries in third world countries
    it just takes on different forms here
    under a guise of freedom
    I hope I’m resonating with any of you “free” women out there who find yourself forced to live with kids in the house due to economy/financial/SOCIETAL CONSTRUCT reasons
    of breeders
    we will turn the tides

  20. woe to you AND YOUR CHILDREN when “they” shall begin to call HER BLESSED who never gave birth

    it says woe to breeders
    when it says “and your children” not just “you” but those with children
    its clearly contrasting the ones with children and the ones without/NEVER had
    and it says its a “woe” to them (breeders)
    as she who never gave birth will be called blessed
    many women and men have admitted to using the womb as a weapon
    its all coming out now
    for control of economy/society. outnumbering even by race or worse yet religions that control your every move and even marry kids (young brides) and just breed breed breed (and usually starve/low iq/inbred/ etc)
    who is really in charge except the non breeders? or those who responsibly bred?
    not two teens in lust who actually HATE each other…(millions of people are bred from that)
    we all pay for it
    breeders kids don’t belong to them
    which is why its a woe to them when non breeders are blessed.
    WE take care of them
    when two people have sex who don’t even really so much as like each other
    and yet we get the bottom of the barrel in life.
    told we cant have financial help BECAUSE we aren’t beat up/on drugs/not pregnant/childless
    that’s tyranny and abuse by breeders
    and it will all come out
    all the talk they do now is only damage control
    using our own good hearts to call us selfish
    we all know breeders are selfish
    they often feel “entitled” the same as their hellspawns do
    to government $ programs
    just for breeding!
    why aren’t non breeders given incentives for not breeding considering we even have the TIME to care for your offspring when you DONT. instead you feel we are FORCED to (financial difficulties) and lord it over us
    this cant really be forgiven
    and it makes you and your kids rightfully hated
    the parent child behavior is the same
    entitled

  21. she who never gave birth
    will have all children run to her it says
    and she will say
    WHO GAVE BIRTH TO ALL THESE “FOR ME” WHEN I WAS AWAY IN EXILE
    theyre HER kids
    as the non breeder
    for a reason

    the Bible is illustrating this
    “she who never gave birth/unmarried/virgin HAS MORE CHILDREN than the married woman says your God”
    this isn’t a religious discussion
    its social and coming true
    didn’t you see what hagar Egyptian slave (breeder) wife did? its same as many do today!
    it says sarah couldn’t give birth so she used the slave girl as the breeder …so then the slave mother /breeder started to taunt her and her son that she did eventually have and was sent away…she wanted inheritance (money) for her breeding abilities
    sarah DIDNT LOVE THE CROTCH FRUIT OF ANOTHER WOMAN and sent her away
    realizing that she was an enemy. taunting her over her breeding “skills” lol
    so then this same “mother” threw her child into a bush so she wouldn’t have to watch it die from starvation/thirst….
    even that well runs dry…
    stop breeding
    IF YOU CANT DO IT WITHOUT HURTING OTHERS
    denying youre hurting others doesn’t count for anything
    youre draining resources and benefitting from a construct that favors you
    that’s called privilege
    based on zero merit
    oftentimes lust/fornication/drugs and more…jobless etc etc
    so..all your kids belong to the childless woman just as bible repeats again and again
    get used to it
    keep them in line or go away like hagar
    don’t bully me
    all I want is well behaved kids
    or
    well you know I wont say it
    I wont care what happens to ya
    the louder you cry the more my ears go shut
    like to a whining child

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