I’m young. I just turned twenty-two, and when I get married I will be three weeks shy of my twenty-fourth birthday. I graduated college recently, and while I am working full-time, I still live at home and don’t really have any expenses. Which is awesome, because I have the opportunity to save up, and my job does not pay very well at all.
But at the same time… I have almost no idea how to be a fully-functioning adult.
I was thinking about this all last night because I’d just signed up for dental and life insurance through my work, and that sort of thing feels really grown-up. Responsibility! Future planning! Insurance! But it also cast into sharp relief the fact that I really don’t know what I’m doing and I’m scared as hell.
How do Other People do it?
I just feel like when we get married, and start living independently, I’m going to be completely lost. There’s so much I don’t know. My mom is basically flawless — she works full-time and still manages to be a domestic goddess. I watch her and just wonder how on earth she manages it.
And it’s not even just the domestic household chores that freak me out — I’m actually pretty handy at that sort of thing — but things like bills and loans and car payments and mortgages and insurance and savings and home maintenance and car repairs.
And then, since we want to have kids, and to start relatively soon, it occurred to me that in five or six years I’m going to be a MOM. That got me even more freaked out. I babysit, and I know a lot about taking care of kids, but there’s so much stuff I never even considered — like sleep training, and breastfeeding, and what way the baby should sleep (on zir stomach? back? side? The research seems to change every ten years).
Pointless panicking, I know. Because the truth is, I know that eventually I will learn all this stuff. And while I may screw up, I’m not going to be alone in all this — I’ll have my husband with me, and we’ll figure it out, the way everyone does.
In the ever-wise words of Rubeus Hagrid, “What’s coming will come, and we’ll have to meet it when it does.”
So, let’s hear it Homies who’ve been there. When did you feel like you’d truly become an adult? What steps were most important to getting to that feeling?