Category Archive

Relationships

Let’s talk about our partners, and how we negotiate sharing our homes and lives with them.

Meeting the other woman helped me overcome my divorce

Meeting the other woman helped me overcome my divorce

Ordering my coffee, she is right behind me. I can feel the nerves in the air and her eyes on my back. This is not a first date or a job interview, but it is the first time in my life I have been the bigger person and put my hurt aside. On this day, I sat down with the woman my husband left me for. The woman who he kept secret from me, the woman who turned my world upside down on one awful fall day, the woman that my now four-year-old calls her second mom.

My partner wants to become polyamorous, what do I do?

My partner wants to become polyamorous, what should I do?

You may remember Logan from her poignant post about coming out to your family as polyamorous. She was kind enough to answer this reader’s question for us and we are so grateful for her insight! I’m in a long-term, serious, and happy relationship with my partner. When we first met we discussed relationships and limits […]

Diary of a Divorcee: from grief to reflection to liberation

Diary of a divorcee: from grief to reflection to liberation

I’m also a hopeless romantic and always fantasized that my relationships would be like Ethan Embry and Jennifer Love Hewitt’s in Can’t Hardly Wait. Here I am at 31, a single divorcee — a feeling I truly haven’t experienced since before I was 19. And you know what? It’s liberating…

6 ways to help an introverted friend find love (or to help yourself!)

6 ways to help an introverted friend find love (or to help yourself!)

“Many or even most of my dearest friends are geeky introverts who are (unhappily) single. They express that they want to be in relationships and start families and I’d love to be able to help with some advice. How do I help my beloved nerdy home-lurkers?”

We’ve got some tips…

Being broken doesn't mean you're not strong (and capable of being loved)

Being broken doesn’t mean you’re not strong (and capable of being loved)

To love someone who has been broken is a brave thing to do. We have lived a life most know nothing about. To the broken, love is a scary and volatile concept. Love isn’t sunshine and roses but thorns and monsoons. To the broken, yelling and raised voices are a part of a typical conversation and something to which we are accustomed. But being broken can be beautiful and strong… and you’re capable of being loved.

finding new love and marriage after divorce

Second marriage is not a dirty word: finding new love and marriage after divorce

Divorce is an ugly and catastrophic personal experience. You have to find a way to let go of the past and move forward, learning from what you have been through. The next relationship may be scary, the possibility of finding a happily ever after could be dismal. But finding happiness is worth the risk of letting someone in. I withstood divorce and came out on the other side, so I thought I would give you a few reasons why you shouldn’t give up on love or marriage after divorce…

Adventure vs. settling down: can we make it work when I want to roam and he wants to stay home?

Adventure vs. settling down: can we make it work when I want to roam and he wants to stay home?

My husband and I spent our 20s working short term contracts all over the country. For me every day was an adventure, but it turned out the itinerant life made my husband miserable, so we settled down. But now I’m miserable. The thing is, I still love my husband. We still make each other laugh until neither of us can move. We still have sex. But the quiet life isn’t for me.

So what do we do? Is it possible to be happily married to someone who doesn’t share your life goals? Or do I divorce my best friend?

Growing up southern as a lesbian late bloomer

Growing up Southern as a lesbian late bloomer

When you’re raised in a way that shields you from anything that’s different, it really alters your ability to think outside of the small little box that’s your world. Had I met someone when I was younger who was gay or bisexual, maybe there would have been bells and whistles going off and I wouldn’t have been clueless for so long. Who knows? But I was blind for a very very long time. I met a guy who I married, had a couple of kids, and that’s how the story was supposed to go…

…only it didn’t.