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Asexuality and queerness redefined sex for us (& how we're making it work)

What is sexual compatibility? Insecurity made our life a little rocky early on. I worried that my partner's asexuality was simply disinterest in me, while she worried that I might prefer someone else. But after nearly seven years together, we've ironed that out — and in the process, built a sex life that we both find satisfying, exploring a non-traditional definition of sex. Here are the tools that we use to help us to define sex for ourselves…

This one-year anniversary shoot proves that it's always worth snagging stunning photos

Whether you hated your wedding photos, didn't have a wedding, want to celebrate a milestone, or just want to capture how awesome you've been looking lately, a couple's photo shoot is always a good idea. You don't need to have had a child or gotten engaged or married to snag yourself from frameable shots. This is exactly what Ashley and Nick did at their plaid-covered one-year anniversary shoot.

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Individuation: stumbling toward emotional self-reliance

Maybe the most obvious way to talk about individuation is to say that, in the context of my marriage, if there was a bad feeling, I would look to my spouse to help me with it. Over the years, this mean that basically I held him at least partially responsible for my sense of well-being. Then, suddenly, my sense of well-being was very much my responsibility alone… and ultimately, it always was.

Talking about sexuality: the big dirty elephant in the room

Talking about sexuality is a conversation that can make folks a tad uncomfortable. Sexuality is always some big dirty elephant in the room — it's there and obvious but everyone avoids talking about it. That's because, for many of us, it has been taught for generations that sex is a dirty thing we keep to ourselves.

We offer sexual education in some schools, we talk to our kids about the birds and the bees, but beyond that, how often do we ever really talk about sexuality?