Having a baby didn’t stop us from touring with our band — we just bring him along
While there are plenty of things that haven’t made touring any more difficult with our baby, there are also plenty of considerations we take that probably seem first nature by now. We have to figure out nap times. We keep bedtime in mind. We’re always surveying our venues, hangouts, and potential non-motor-home sleeping quarters for baby-friendliness. Luckily, we’re self-sufficient: we have two forms of heat (propane and electric), plenty of blankets, and everything we need inside our mobile house.
Being friends after divorce: Can we act like adults?
After we sign the paperwork, where do we go from here? Do we drift apart as adults and friends usually do or stay involved in each other’s lives? Can we ever get past “what might have been” and move on to “this is where/who we are now”?
How writing erotic fan fiction changed my sex life
Since the beginning of my sexual awakening (or when my high school boyfriend put his hands down my pants), I loved sex. Along with sex, my other interests are TV shows, movies, and books. There is a particular workplace sitcom that I adore and almost exclusively write for. The bridge between these interests is not a long one, and soon I was writing erotic fan fiction. And yes, after (a little) personal deliberation, I told my husband that I was a fan fiction writer. But I don’t think the switch in our sex life really happened until he read My Really Long Fic.
How can we make a non-sucky adoption profile?
My husband and I are beginning the open adoption process, and it’s time to make a profile. We’re Offbeat Lite (yoga, geeky, vegan, non-Christian), and all of the samples I’ve seen online look like Pinterest threw up on them. I want expectant parents to get to know us — after all, they’ll be part of our family — but I’m dealing with pressure to conform to the script of “loving couple describes each other lovingly while lovingly waxing poetic about the loving love they have to give your lovely child.”
How can you cope with the smell of smoking housemates?
I am a non-smoker who is stuck living in a smoky rental house. Sinus problems and health risks aside, I have a sensitive nose and would just like to smell something else for a change. Does anyone have tips to minimize the smell other than Febrezing the crap out of everything?
Everything I know about marriage I learned from Terry Miller (Dan Savage’s husband)
Back in 2006 when I was working a full-time corporate job, while also trying to write what would become Offbeat Bride the book, I almost had a nervous breakdown. Desperate for some guidance and inspiration, I sent an email to my local hero, Dan Savage. His advice was basically that he owed it all to his partner. His then-partner? Terry Miller, who is now (thanks to Washington’s marriage laws) Dan’s husband. In the 10 years since I had this exchange, I’ve basically built my het marriage to emulate their gay marriage, and I’m convinced it’s been the secret to everything being happy.
Of mothers and daughters and loudmouths
I look mostly like my father, but I got my mother’s mouth.
The second oldest of four girls, my mother was always one of the loud ones. She talked loud. She sang loud. At her Catholic boarding school, she was always popular among her peers, known for being outgoing and gregarious. She became a hippy and strummed the loudest campfire guitar. She became a midwife and founded a national organization and spoke loudly at international women’s health conferences. For her 50th birthday, she produced an entire CD of her songs, and threw a big party for herself. She started the night by announcing into the microphone, “Everyone, please be quiet and stop talking. It’s time for me to sing.”
Post-breakup decoration therapy: Heal your heart by rearranging your furniture
The idea is simple: After a break-up of two (or more) persons living together, there’s often this person left behind to live in the “old house,” filled with memories of happier times or painful fights. A good decoration therapy session is about making significant changes to this environment and it usually involves friends, booze and lots of fun.