Category Archive

Becoming Parents

If you’re definitely GAME ON when it comes to having kids, this is the place for you! You can read birth stories, adoption tales, and the different ways having kids might impact your relationships.

Your OMGI’MPREGNANT stories: the feelings that come with peeing on a stick

In keeping with our day’s theme, I asked our Facebook friends how they reacted when they peed on a stick and found out they were pregnant! Three hours later, there were over 75 reponses… here are a few that had to be shared.

Parent envy: the long road to parenthood for LGBT families

I didn’t choose to be Queer, but I did choose to follow that path and I thought I had prepared myself for what that meant in terms of family planning. I did not expect to feel this way — so torn up about the prospect of being childless. So angry that for some it is so easy it becomes accidental. My hope, in sharing these feelings is to shed them. I can’t imagine I am the only one to harbor such emotions and yet it feels lonely here.

Legal questions for families with sperm donors

The background of the case is so similar to the way many of my lesbian couples have chosen to grow their families. Partners Jennifer Schreiner and Angela Bauer wanted to have a baby together, but chose not to use a sperm bank. Instead, they opted to find their donor, William Marotta, on Craigslist. The mothers ended their relationship and Angela, the gestational mother, needed to apply for state welfare benefits. The parents in this case all believed they had made a valid written agreement before their daughter was born, stating that William would have no parental rights or responsibilities. The mothers want no child support, and are testifying in his defense.

If you’re struggling to conceive, talking to friends in the same boat may help you cope

I wrote about our struggle on my blog, and the reception was incredible. People shared that they’d been trying, personal struggles of their own, that they’d be thinking of me. No one gave me well-meaning but awful advice. Some people who now have tiny children shared that it took them years of trying to get to that point and they sympathised with my struggle. All up, it has been a positive experience and I’m glad I put myself out there.

My partner won’t be at our son’s birth: dealing with birthing almost alone

Due to circumstances beyond both of our control — a move, a job change for me, and my partner’s desire to really try the job it took him over a year to find — it looks like I’m going to be having this baby alone. There’ll be doctors and nurses and maybe a doula, sure, but I always thought my partner would be there with me. And while it’s possible that he may make it for the birth, it’s entirely possible that he will miss it.

I became a parent by straightening a bathroom towel

Does my stepdaughter ever even notice that the towel gets magically straightened? I have no idea, but the chances of her thanking me for it are slim, and my mother was right. It’s not the point. Is it important that the towel be straightened? Well, it certainly increases the chances that she actually gets a dry towel next time, but who knows if she even notices whether or not her towel is dry? It makes me feel better about the state of the bathroom and in the grand scheme of parenting, that is not something to be taken lightly.

Our family: two gay dads raising a foster son

This is a tale about the lives of two men and their (highly opinionated) son. I do think it’s worth telling, but it’s a simple one about our little family. I hope that by telling this side to our story, more people will become motivated to become foster carers as well.

How to make a baby: sperm donors, IVF, and mad science experiments

Choosing a sperm donor is a little bit like setting up an Xbox avatar. You begin by deciding on the ethnicity, hair color, and eye color of the fellow whose sperm you’d like to combine with your egg to make your baby. Then you enter that criteria into a sperm-bank search engine, which returns a list of matching anonymous males who passed rigorous genetic tests and filled out detailed questionnaires. Finally, you pore through each donor profile, considering things like his height, weight, build, SAT scores, family medical history, sexual orientation, whether or not he has moles, the shape of his nose and mouth, and in some cases, his baby photo or voice sample.