8 tips for developing personal style when you have none

Guest post by Jackie

It's amazing how a cute dress, colored tights, and fun accessories can go a LONG way.
It’s amazing how a cute dress, colored tights, and fun accessories can go a LONG way. (Outfit from ModCloth.)
I have never considered myself “fashionable.” Growing up, I had the tomboy thing down and wore jeans and t-shirts through high school. And then college. And grad school too. At a tech school, the girls who put in effort to look nice stood out (and had to deal with occasional backlash), but always seemed cool and confident to me. Every so often I would get the urge to “dress cuter” and swear not to acquire any more free unisex t-shirts, and wear a skirt here and there. But inevitably I ran out of outfits to wear and reverted back to the same jeans-and-t-shirt look, not because it was more “me” but out of habit and because it was easy.

Then, I decided this was the year that I would finally dress the way I really want to, as part of my quest to figure out what being an adult really means to me. After a few months of going through my closet, lots of online searching, and one exhausting trip to the mall, I am starting to get a wardrobe I really like and figured I could share some tips for those of you who also didn’t just figure this stuff out at puberty.

Do some research

Like any good nerd, I started by reading as much as I could. Fashion blogs and Pinterest are a good place to figure out what styles you like, and just plain get exposure to new ideas. I also checked out a few books from the library about style and fashion, with plenty of pictures. Most of what I learned from there is what might work best with my body type, what the basics were, and how to mix up basics with the right add-ons to create something new.

Go through your closet

I had a couple drawers stuffed with the aforementioned unisex t-shirts. I kept my favorites for sleeping, lounging, and exercising in; then donated the rest. I now have a lot more space for new stuff, everything is easier to find, and I also dug up some nice things I had forgotten about because they had been buried. If you have things you never wear, that don’t fit, or that just plain don’t make you feel good, swap/sell/donate/toss!

Get basics, in multiples

I’ve been having a lot of fun looking at things like dresses and shoes, but most of what I wear is still based on jeans and a t-shirt. However, now I’ll go for something like a women’s cut V-neck that flatters me, and get it in several different bright colors. Jeans are really difficult for me, so when I find a pair that actually fits, I’ll get more than one. If you’re shopping and happen to find something basic that you plan to wear a lot and fits you perfectly, I would highly recommend getting several at once if you can.

Accessories are your friend

And, sometimes the cheapest and quickest way to change up your outfit. If I swap my Converse for a nice pair of flats, my backpack for a more structured cross-body purse, and throw on a scarf, boom: instant grownup! And definitely think outside the box. I’ve been trying colored tights while it’s still cooler out to make a plain black skirt or dress look spiffy. I’ve heard statement necklaces are a thing now, too.

Get a few bolder pieces

I needed a jacket to replace the tattered hoodies I wear during those in-between seasons, so on a whim I ordered a cropped red faux-leather jacket online and I love it! It’s louder than what I would normally have picked before, but now I wear it just about every day, weather permitting. I also treated myself to a fun pair of shoes that I wear when I want to step it up a bit. If you can afford it, taking risks on one or two louder things is a good way to evolve your look without a complete wardrobe overhaul.

Understand the trade-off between quality and price

In grad school, I got a cheap pair of boots in the fall and wore them just about every day. By the new year, however, they were all scratched up and the soles had collapsed into a soggy mess after a really rainy night out, and now they just sit in my closet. So, after graduation, I treated myself to a nice pair of brown boots that cost over three times as much. I still wear them all the time, and though they’re scuffed, they are even more comfortable than ever and still look cool (plus, they’re waterproof). By the time they break down, I will have paid pennies for each wear I got out of them. On the other hand, those “riskier” items I mentioned above? I went cheap. A good rule of thumb is to be cheap with trendier things, and go for the best quality you can afford on things you know you’ll wear all the time.

Don’t be afraid to go online

I don’t know about you, but shopping in a mall is completely exhausting and frustrating. It’s still useful for certain things like finding those perfect-fit basics, but I’ve actually had much better luck online. Many places now offer free shipping and returns, and being able to read reviews (particularly about sizing) and see what other people wear it with has been awesome. So far, my favorite places have been ModCloth and Zappos, though there is tons out there.

Break your own rules!

Finally, this one has been both the trickiest, and the most important for me. I had to realize that I had been holding on to weird internalized rules that I had developed when I was growing up. After the “popular” girls rejected me in elementary school, I had fashioned an identity out of being a tomboy, and not concerning myself with any of that silly “girly” stuff later. So, I didn’t wear makeup, I never wore anything other than sneakers, and I hardly ever wore skirts and dresses unless there was some special event. Going to a tech school for college also didn’t help, as girls who took the time to look nicer also had to spend a lot more time proving themselves, amid subtle messages that feminine = inferior. All of that added up to me sticking to my same safe formula, and a growing sense of dissatisfaction with the way I presented myself to the world. So, it’s really worth examining what reasons you have for dressing how you do now, if it’s anything other than “it makes me feel good.”

Breaking out of my style rut has been an interesting experience, and a few months after I started I now feel happier about how I look and feel more confident when I go out. It will always be a work in progress, but my clothes are starting to reflect something that feels more “me” overall, everyone else be damned. Hopefully, if you’ve been feeling stuck too, some of these tips can help you out; and if you have your own, or any thoughts on personal style, I’d love to hear them!

Comments on 8 tips for developing personal style when you have none

  1. My main issue is that I like looking nice, but 1.) nothing ever fits me (weird body type), 2.) pants, especially jeans, styles keep changing, so when I find something I like, even if I buy 4 of them, when they all wear out I have to search for months to find even one other pair of pants/jeans that looks as good (the problem is that I have just enough belly fat that jeans in my size show it too much, and jeans one size up that hide it are too big in every other area and look baggy & saggy around my legs and butt), and 3.) I’m lazy and can’t stand uncomfortable clothing. And I find most clothing uncomfortable – I’ll wear tights, skirts, cute tops etc. to work but on the weekends or off time I’ll so desire comfortable clothing – jeans and plain tops (I hate unisex t-shirts) that I just won’t put in the effort. Shoes are the same. I don’t wear cute shoes because they’re never comfortable (and I mean it – cute flats aren’t supportive enough and often pinch my toes, cute heels JUST NO HEELS NO NO NO, so I end up in “sensible shoes” or sneakers/hiking boots).

    • In reference to your point 1, I think nearly everybody thinks they have a weird body type. My younger sister, an athletic, petite, well-proportioned, size 4, will INSIST that she has a weird body type and that clothes don’t fit her.

      It’s not you, it the clothes. Clothes are made for an average, one that ends up not really fitting anybody. We are all special snow flakes in body as well as mind.

    • I think boot cut jeans in a darker wash have been in for years now- that’s what I go with! I think the reason that they aren’t going out of style is that they are flattering on almost any body type.

      I get knee problems when I wear heels, and flats make me walk awkwardly. I wish more sneakers would come in black or grey because they don’t stick out as sneakers as much. They make comfortable dress shoes for men, but what’s out there for the ladies? What dress shoe can I wear with a skirt that has a slight heel but is still comfortable?

      • I’m with you on the shoes. When I walk in flip flops or ballet flats I start to get a pain up my spine.

        I have had good luck with Natural Sole by Naturalizer. They are not just old lady shoes anymore. Most or their “flats” are built more like sneakers with more height in the heel area. They are also rubber soled so they provide cushion for walking so I don’t feel the pavement trying to crush my spine.

        Here’s a link: http://www.naturalizer.com

    • Oxfords! And chunky low heeled boots. I prefer ones that lace, otherwise they don’t fit me very well. Also, some maryjanes have low chunky heels and a wide toe box. Or even just trade out the running sneakers for cute leather sneakers. You’d be amazed what switching out the material will do!

  2. I need a personal stylist- or somebody to pull things off the shelves and insist I try them on. I have no idea how to be ‘girly’ beyond taking it to the extreme. It’s either chucks, jeans and a t-shirt or semi-formal wedding attire. I have no in-between. I need to learn how to do my hair in a way other than a bun, as well. I just… don’t know how and it’s so daunting. I don’t want to do full makeup and hair every day but something new and saucy would be nice. Where do people learn these things? My mother and sisters never taught me…

    • Re: makeup, look up tutorials online. If there’s a particular celebrity or TV character whose makeup you like, add that name to your search. You can also search for different styles of makeup like day, evening, everyday, 5-minute face, etc. Youtube and Pinterest usually have a lot of good stuff.

      • I love make-up tutorials – my favourite Youtubers are Tanya Burr, Lauren Luke (panacea 81) and pixiwoo. They’re all really down-to-earth and have loads of stuff for people just starting out in make-up, or looking for a more natural look.

    • Casual dresses! From Target to Eddie Bauer, they are some cute and comfortable dresses out there.

    • Sometimes, sometimes I say, when I’m at certain stores asking the dressing room assistants or sales assistants to suggest something can be a major win. BUT, you have to be ready to say no when it turns out they don’t get you or your body type. I’ve had some really good luck a few times with things I never would have tried on my own that turned out amazing! And then a few times I’ve had to be very firm with a skinny little girl or two trying to pressure me into buying something because they just didn’t get why the thing she thought was so cute wasn’t working for me.

  3. Can I just add a rule about not being afraid of your body? I spent so long trying to dress to minimise the things i hate that I realised I didnt actually own any clothes that filled me with joy to wear. I probably wear too many things these days that I “shouldnt” for my size and shape but because I feel good and happy, I have more confidence and just rock whatever I am wearing. I have never had more compliments! And it is slowly developing into a personal style – a little offbeat but my very own. πŸ™‚

    Also, a great way of making unisex tees more feminine is to cut the neckline – i never hem mine because I like the look of a raw hem vneck but there are plenty of tutorials out there if you prefer a cleaner look!

    Brilliant post Jackie!

    • This is a really good point. I wear a M to L, but when I shop, I’ll grab sizes from all over the place depending on how I want it to look. I’ve gotten cardigans in a S so that it will hang a certain way and tops in XL so they’ll be more tunic like. Fit the clothes to your body and style, not your body to the clothes.

    • Thank you! And absolutely, it’s all about the confidence. If you’re confident and happy, people will think you look good no matter what you’re wearing.

      I will definitely have to try cutting my t-shirts. Genius!

  4. For the plus size crowd, have you heard about http://intro.gwynniebee.com/? I haven’t tried it yet but I’m hearing good things about it. It’s like Netflix for plus size clothing – monthly subscription fee, unlimited clothing borrowing options and you can keep them as long as you like.

    I’m thinking that a membership might allow me to try clothes and brands I wouldn’t usually be able to afford or that I feel uncomfortable just ordering blindly online.

    • I was scanning through the comments to see if anyone else mentioned Gwynnie Bee. While they state plus size, it’s actually size 10 and up, so many who wouldn’t fall under the plus size umbrella can also use it. I’m awaiting delivery of my first, three-item box, but I already plan to subscribe (and increase my number of items to 5 or 7).

      The big draw for me is that I tend to yo-yo in size, between a 12 and 16. This way I can get items that fit at any size, without a huge financial commitment. Also, I’m trying to branch out and try styles I normally wouldn’t, all without any huge $$$ risk.

  5. I am soooo glad other women feel the same way about fashion as me. My mum died when i was 9 and i was brought up living with my dad and brother. I really struggle with how to dress and do my hair in a girly way, as i didn’t have that female influence. I have a few Vivien of Holloway dresses that i crack out for special events, but the rest of the time i’m stuck in jeans and a t-shirt. I want to dress more grown up, but i just didn’t know where to start. Hopefully the tips in this post will be the springboard i need to get my style sorted. My daughter is currently 4 so i need to get it sorted in the next couple of years to stop her following in my fashion footsteps.

  6. Love this post! I’m right there with you. Tomboy growing up, went to Purdue, and now I’m a stay at home mom who lives in jeans and tee shirts. *sigh*

    One part of the problem is that I really have very few places or occasions to get “dressed up” for. I mean, if you think of style as a skill, then I guess practice would help, but I have little opportunity to practice.

    Also, the advice to “find what looks good on your body” is sound, but I can’t ever seem to find good examples for my type of body. Most fashion is designed for and displayed by women who are much thinner than I am and quite differently shaped.

    I would love to see a regular feature here about this. Maybe the Offbeat team could discuss different styles, show pictures of how people actually dress in the real world (as opposed to TV, movies, or magazines), or talk with readers about how they shop for and maintain their looks.

    Really, I just want to look like Garcia from Criminal Minds while I clean the cat box and do grocery shopping. Is that so wrong?

    • I spend my summers on my brother’s farm, where grubby jeans, dirt-covered t-shirt, and plain rubber boots are basically the uniform, since we’re handling dirt all the time. However, because of our very low baseline for dress, even something as simple as going in to town for groceries warrants dressing up β€” not ΓΌber-fancy, but definitely nice jeans & a pretty top, probably some cute flats, and a nice sweater if it’s cool out. So, if you consider going anywhere outside the house to be an occasion for which to dress up (even if just a little), that could be a great way to practice! There is absolutely nothing wrong with wearing things that fit your sense of style for even the most mundane tasks!

  7. Another thing I would add is that you don’t have to get everything all at once. People I know with great style build it up over a few years, grab things they like with each fashion season. This was always a big issue for me because I dropped 50 pounds in college and basically had to start my wardrobe over. But now that I’m more or less consistent in my weight, I can spend a little bit here and there and slowly build up my wardrobe and my personal style!

  8. Thx for the tips!! I’ve been struggling with personal style for a few years now; I occasionally have a need to be slightly more professional, but still comfortable and not terribly girly, in a male-dominated field doing sales; also, trying to look my age (I’m recently 31, but look younger frequently), plus work around being not-so-skinny with a giant bustline. Oh yeah, on absolutely no budget AT ALL.

    My SO and I are metalsmiths (blacksmiths that don’t just work in black iron), so for shopwork I obviously wear fire-appropriate work clothes (jeans, tees, hoodies; cotton mainly) and around the house I wear comfy stuff (which of course makes me feel like a slob, but if I’m having a bad fibro day and not leaving the house, what’re you gonna do?). I try to dress a hair nicer when running errands, but the concept of dressing up to go to the grocery store just feels weird. Out at events where we sell our stuff usually I’m in costume, but we do the NC state fair and there is where I’m having issues…….

    What I’ve come up with is a style that my SO terms “the artist’s girlfriend”; well-fit classic nicer jeans and decent top (either a nicer knit jersey or a buttondown), with artsy accessories (jewelry, scarves, shawls, socks) in crazier colors. Still almost work clothes, if I take off the accessories, but the right combination that I look like an artistic type who actually makes the metalwork myself also. Psychology of sales, if I look like I could possibly know what I’m talking about, people are more willing to buy stuff. Also lets my personality shine through, and I’ve gotten into some of the most interesting conversations about how I not only make the metal, I knit the shawls too!

    Though I don’t know if that whole ‘dressing my age’ thing is going to take a hit or not; I’ve been obsessed about doing the tips of my (hip-length) hair ombre purple lately………..

  9. I haven’t exactly had a complete style revamp but I have changed a few things.

    I have this weird thing where the image I have of myself in my head is gorgeous and I love it. Then I look in the mirror and I’m disappointed. Like body dysmorphia, except I think I look better than I do. If it’s a thing and has a name let me know!

    I try to dress up my jeans and t-shirt look by varying what shoes and jackets I wear. It means I have to buy fewer things to update my wardrobe. Changing my shoes from converse to a mid heel court shoe is just enough of a difference to make me look a little better presented. I also add an elasticated belt to a plain t-shirt if I want it to look a bit more grown up and fitted.

    I have tried wearing more dresses and skirts but skirts break up my proportions in a way that just looks wrong. The closest thing I get to dresses is a jumper dress over leggings but it’s enough

    • I have that weird body/mind thing too! Sometimes I will just feel like I look AMAZING, but when I see pictures of myself from that time, or even look in a mirror, it’s so disappointing. I don’t know if it has a name, but I totally understand! I am slowly realizing though that I can rely a little on what other people (i.e. sister and husband) say about how I look. If they think it’s cute, and I FEEL cute, then it probably is and it’s probably my brain that is being stupid. πŸ™‚

  10. Right now my style is in flux: I have my usual jeans/cords and fitted shirts with nursing access for homewear, unisex Tshirt with jeans and runners for work (afterschool youth worker) and date night/sunday best that usually involves skirts and dresses with fun accessories. The look I want is the look I associate with my career path: The Eccentric Language Arts teacher. Think scarves, patterned tights, funky shoes, and statement necklaces with a simple “base” uniform (for me this means navy/grey/black dresses). Right now I have a difficult time blending my different looks, and I’m slowly trying to build my professional wardrobe while at the same trying dressing an ever-changing body as I gradually wean my daughter. My personal style challenges involve learning different ways to do hair and makeup, and finding a brighter wardrobe for summer. Canadian winters can last a long time, so I’m always thinking “Winter is coming” when I really should be focused on sunshine clothes.

  11. Well … I’m another homeschooled nerd raised by a hippie πŸ™‚ And getting me INTO jeans and hoodies was actually a fashion move upwards for me!

    What I have noticed about myself … I actually look better if I’m comfortable. Any “official” photos of me dressed up, in a gown, etc., look terrible. In a hiking skirt and a tshirt, smiling widely, I look much better. And my boyfriend rarely notices how I dress, but when he does compliment my appearance, it’s always when I think I’m a mess.

    I do need to stop buying clothes that I think look good, and then never wearing them because I … well, I don’t know why, if I could solve that “because” maybe I wouldn’t buy them in the first place!!

    • Yeah, the jeans and hoodies were a big step up from my (hippie-nerdy homeschooler) sweatpants and turtlenecks handed down from the neighbour across the street (who had cerebral palsy, so I guess her mom picked out all her clothes…). I kind of cringe when I look back at old photos where I’m wearing the crummiest clothes and my hair isn’t even brushed… but, on the other hand, I didn’t really think about how I looked for the longest time, and even now, I’m not really bound by fashion / fads β€” it’s given me a lot of freedom to experiment with my own style without a lot of peer-pressure.

  12. My biggest fashion influence? The TLC show What Not To Wear. I realize it is pretty canned an formulaic, but seriously, they have taught me much:

    1. Know what colors looks good on you – This makes shopping way easier. You might be able to tell this by trial and error. There are also websites that show you, based on your “season,” which colors look best on you. Almay (and probably other companies too) makes these fool proof eyeshadow pallets designed for your eye color with a paint by number style guide on the back.

    2. Dress for your body type, not based on trends – I have big hips and a small waist. I wear waist-defining styles. I don’t even bother trying something on if it doesn’t have a defined waist.

    3. Buy quality pieces – Stacey and Clinton also recommend tailoring. Better to have a smaller wardrobe of nicer quality, well tailored pieces.

    4. It’s okay to overdress – Doing errands, picking kids up, weekend party, if you are a bit more dressed up than the occasion requires people will just assume that you are coming or going from someplace more formal.

    5. You deserve to dress well NOW – Don’t wait to lose the weight or have a better job, dress for yourself now. Don’t punish yourself.

    6. *Most Important* It’s not you, it’s the clothes – How many women do you know that say jeans don’t fit them? Every.single.one. I have never met a woman that doesn’t think she has this problem. It’s not your butt, it’s the jeans. Don’t blame yourself if clothes don’t fit. It’s not that your body is the wrong shape, it’s that those particular pants are the wrong shape for it. Keep looking.

    So my suggestion is to watch a few episodes of WNTW, love Clinton for being caring and Stacey for being snarky, and learn from them.

    • All of this! As an out and proud fat woman who LOVES fashion and makes it a point to be an example of a well-dressed person who is not defined by my size (who embraces it!) I feel I am constantly having to challenge those close to me on the issue of “I don’t want to buy more clothes because I hate my body right now.” I wish there was a way to impart a sense of peace and self-acceptance to these wonderful people that I love so much – you are beautiful, and you deserve to feel excited and proud of yourself and how you look every day, even if you are just at work/running errands/taking care of the kids, etc. I see everyday as an opportunity to look nice and take care of myself. Everyday is dress up day, to a degree, because if we don’t create the opportunity to feel fancy, when will it happen?

  13. am I the only person who wants to know where this cropped red leather jacket came from?
    because it sounds like it needs to exist in my life like yesterday

    • BOOM. Now you guys know all my secrets.

      Sizing is a little weird, like the reviews say, but I love it anyway (wearing it right now!). There are lots of other jackets with interesting hardware/sideways zippers that I’d love to try when this one wears out too.

  14. Thanks for these tips – Over the past few years I lost a lot of weight and have been struggling with how to step out of that. I used to make all of my wardrobe choices based on what fit and what I could afford and now there are so many options that its hard to know where to spend the money and even what you like.

  15. I’ve found I can mix my old staples with my newer, more “grownup” stuff. I can wear jeans and band t-shirt but throw on a suit jacket and ballet flats, or heels, for instance. I still wear chucks. I will never give up my chucks.

  16. I found the book “How to Never Look Fat Again” helpful because I was tired of strangers asking me if I was pregnant (really, strangers?) It’s not a very helpful book for cool style tips, but it helped a lot with figuring out what fits and flatters me.

    Also, some stores (J Crew, Nordstrom) offer free personal shopping services, which can be a good way to get ideas and another person’s opinion — especially helpful for building your higher-quality wardrobe staples.

  17. If finding the money to try something new is an issue, ask for gift cards to stores you like for holidays instead of other gifts. I find that I’m willing to get something that I otherwise would never buy for myself (maybe it’s impractical, or it’s a new look for me that I’m not yet sure about, or it’s just out of my price range for one item) if I have a gift card. This is how I’ve ended up with some pretty cool dresses for the first time in years. Gift cards sometimes feel impersonal, so I take a picture of myself wearing what I bought with it and email it as a thank you note.

  18. I’m a college student whose wardrobe consists primarily of old t-shirts from high school and middle school, but I’m heading off to law school in the fall and would like to step up my style on a casual level as well as a professional one. Between this post and the comments, there is so much helpful information here! But I’ve got a question that’s kind of gross.

    So, my underarms sweat pretty much constantly, no matter how hot or cold I am or how I’m holding my arms. I’ve tried prescription deodorant-antiperspirants and natural ones, but nothing really seems to work on me for long. My old tees are loose enough through the arms that it usually takes a while before I sweat through them, so that’s not too much of a problem. When it comes to nicer clothes, though, I generally prefer the look of fitted tops–but anything at all fitted through the arms/upper chest starts to get damp within just a few minutes. The few times I’ve worn suits I’ve had to dry clean them immediately after, because both the blouse underneath and the jacket were damp by the end of the day. Anyone else have any advice for working around/disguising this problem? Should I just suck it up and start buying things with dolman sleeves?

    • More structured clothing with thicker fabric that stands away from your body helps. For a presentation I was giving, I purposefully picked a dark dark purple shirt dress, and it was great- structured to stay away from my pits and dark enough so it wouldn’t show.
      Also, throw a light weight cardigan on over it, and then you won’t have to worry about people noticing.

  19. My personal style comes down to “what actually fits ok and doesn’t look completely revolting”. As a plus-sized person who is NOT REMOTELY shaped like the majority of plus-sized models, fatshion bloggers, etc. I have the hardest time finding anything that doesn’t look awful on me.

    I’ve resigned myself to feeling like fashion and style is not something I will ever have.

  20. What if you just don’t care about fashion, but the world expects you to care?

    Right now I’m a grad student, so I can get away with wearing decent jeans, crappy boots/flats, and a tee under a cardigan practically every day. Sure, I wouldn’t mind some stylish outfits, but in jeans/tees I’m presentable, I’m ready for any weather or any event (missed the bus and have to walk home? No problem!), I can hide my endless sweating, and I get far fewer catcalls. Win.

    But I know that I’m already being judged for/by my choice of outfit… and I know that will just get worse when I start job-hunting. I resent the idea – the fact? – that, at least at first, my clothes will speak more loudly than my accomplishments or my ideas. I resent the fact I’ll have to spend money I don’t have on clothes I don’t like but are “appropriate.” I resent that wearing comfortable clothes is considered “lazy.” I resent the fact that a lack of makeup is seen as rebellious. And I resent the fact that there is little chance of escaping any of this.

    Blerg. Maybe I should ask/beg/hire my stylish friends to clothes-hunt for me? Is there such a thing as a help-me-get-dressed party?

    (Sorry for the rant, y’all!)

    • I understand this totally. Perhaps for jobhunting, just upgrade your own style rather than changing it. Interview-appropriate trousers, flats, a jersey shirt and a fine-knit cardigan don’t seem hugely different to what you wear now and would be comfortable.

      If your sweating really is endless, maybe see your doctor about it – there are prescription-only solutions that can help or even botox in your underarms.

  21. It’s fine to mix and match tomboy and girly – I wear my dresses with Dr Martens constantly. Hard femme is the best!

  22. Ugh, you pull at my heart strings. My nerdy t-shirts full of puns, animes and bands, and my go to worn out comfy jeans and my vans, plus my bun & eyeliner. You’ll almost never see me without those. I actually don’t own anything but those lol BUT I want to dress pretty in lacey things, and twirl in a pretty dress. But I’m a broke ass college student. Oh yeah, and I’M A PLUS SIZE WOMAN. Around my town, it’s skinny or nothing. I can only shop for an hour before I break down in tears and call it quits. I can never find anything over a size 16, and when I do it’s like “Oh well, we have this plain black shirt or this tan one that will make you look naked at first glance” and I just loose all motivation. But my sizing is so weird that even measuring and comparing online leaves me between sizes, and it never fits quit right and I look like a frumpy potato sack. Plus I have a metal allergy, so I have a hard time finding jewelry that works with my skin, but I’m not a beady type person. Lace & metal <3
    I also work in the science field were I have to look nice/professional when people come in or I have to present research, so I'm constantly stressing out when I know an event is coming up. I always look the same and I'm sure it's never a good impression to look frumpy.

  23. Haha thank you for this post. I totally just bought 8 of the same scoop neck tank in different colors. Honey badger don’t care! I’m glad I’m not alone with the style battle. πŸ™‚

  24. I’m totally a t-shirt and jeans girl too… kind of punky/nerdy with lots of accessories… which, I’ve found, can still look put together and grown upish if everything fits right. And being on a budget the best thing I ever did was learn to sew. I have yet to venture into pants but learning how to take in t-shirts and hoodies, create v-necks, and make sleeves longer (I hate it when long sleeves don’t cover my hands) has saved me TONS of money. I can buy things that are an awesome deal but maybe don’t fit quite right and fix them so I don’t have to look like a slob or be uncomfortable 24-7.
    Oh and shoes make a huge difference too. When I still want to be comfy but it’s date night or something I just throw on a pair of boots or cute sandals, and add a jacket or scarf and voila!

  25. The popular crowd rejected me, hard, in elementary school. And I did the same thing… “Fine! I’ll be a tomboy!” Plus, my parents didn’t have enough money to buy me new clothes all the time, so I’d wear what I had until it either didn’t fit or it wore out. I am JUST now breaking out of the rut I’m in. Slowly working cuter clothing into my closet and weeding out the stuff that won’t fit or I’m not as fond of.
    Having FMS makes it a little trickier, because I have to know that the clothing will be comfortable… Luckily, I have a lot of lounge around the house clothing for bad FMS days…

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