Carrie is a Los Angeles-based writer who’s written about her experiences with kink and disability. In this excerpt, she’s describing her first kink experience with her lover (and gives us an awesome suggestion for a safe word):
I never asked her to stop, which is a shame, because our safeword was dinosaur and I still think that’s amazing. But alas, there was no dinosaur, and when she took the blindfold off, I saw that my chest was covered in clothespins. (When you’re in your twenties, nipple clamps are expensive, so you work with what you have.) I’d never seen my body look like that. She must have been pretty impressed, because the first thing she said was, “I’ve never been able to do that before. Nobody has been able to take that many.”
It’s not often (i.e., almost never) that I get told I’m good at a physical activity. But now my body, which had spent so many years letting me down and making decisions without my consent, had gone and done something absolutely right — and done it better. It had done something other people’s bodies, “healthy” bodies, hadn’t been able to.
Read all of “Know Me Where It Hurts: Kink, Sex, and Cerebral Palsy,” over on Autostraddle. Then, let’s get a conversation going about how sex can help you in surprising ways. We’d especially love to hear from Homies with experiences with sex and disability.
PS: Thanks to Catie for emailing us about this!