disability

My husband has chronic health issues, so I can’t get boned

I read the Offbeat Home post about “Asexuality and queerness redefined sex for us,” and I hate to be a downer, but this is so much harder when you are in a monogamous heterosexual relationship…

AllGo app - plus size rating app - plus size yelp app -- There's an app that'll help you find places where you can actually take up space

There’s an app that’ll help you find places where you can actually take up space as a larger person

You know what’s rad? Stores, restaurants, bars, theme parks, and other public spaces which are accessible for everyone — even those of us who take up space or call ourselves fat or otherwise like to not be squeezed into spaces which are only meant for a fraction of the population. I stumbled upon an app that is sort of like a Yelp but for rating accessibility for fat/plus size (you pick your terms!) people. If you are one of these people, these things will sound familiar…

Requiem for Tumblr: pouring one out for a fat-positive space for nudes

Requiem for Tumblr: pouring one out for a fat-positive space for nudes

Besides being a huge blow to sex workers and LGBTQ people, Tumblr’s recent decision to ban adult content from its platform is a misguided form of censorship that will remove an outlet of self-expression for those who fall outside of typical Western beauty standards. There was something else, though, and that something is what I and I think many other people will miss most now that Tumblr has moved to ban adult content from its site…

You’re looking at crones. Can you see the beauty?

In our society, it is not acceptable for female-identified people to age. We are all downloaded with the message that we are supposed to look 20 years old forever. We get mad when our bodies begin to droop, sag, slow down, and our physical/mental abilities change.

But aging is a reminder that we are having a finite experience on the planet… and that is beautiful.

Why it matters so much when a “limpy fat girl” wins the world’s biggest pinup pageant

I’ve been following New Zealand pin-up queen Fran Robertson on Instagram (@frantasy_island, natch) ever since we featured her wedding on Offbeat Bride back in 2016, and it’s been a colorful journey for sure. Recently, I followed along with her photos of traveling from NZ all the way to Las Vegas to compete in the Miss Viva Las Vegas pageant — which she totally won!

I asked Fran if I could interview her about how her experiences are setting new standards for visibility…

Suburbs to city living: How I gave up the house but found a life

How I gave up the house but found a life

For 22 years my family and I lived in Westfield, New Jersey, by many measures, the ideal place to raise a family. There are great schools, quiet leafy streets, multiple transportation options, a walkable downtown, and cultural and religious options to fit diverse tastes. Even its names evokes wholesomeness. When I arrived there in 1995, I knew within 30 minutes that it was the wrong place for me. It took us 22 years to undo that decision. I spent years telling myself that it was not so bad but always hating it. This is a story of finding my comfortable place in the world…

Privilege & bigotry: how I'm owning it and un-learning false narratives

Privilege & bigotry: how I’m owning it and un-learning false narratives

I am a white male from a small village in North Wales, UK. I married a white American female. I am a step-parent of a young child with whom I get along very well; we are a very close family who always strives to support each other unconditionally in any way possible. I was born within the NHS (National Health Service) and was raised to respect everyone and treat people equally. I have been blessed to have many opportunities in life that others have not had. Here’s how I’m acknowledging my privilege and bigotry and making sure I’m striving to use these privileges to be a voice of reason to those who may not understand or have the same privileges as myself.

There were no books for an African American girl in a wheelchair, so I wrote one

When I went looking for a bedtime book that I felt my child could relate to, I came up short. Actually, I came up empty. I searched local independent bookstores, well-known chain bookstores like Barnes & Noble, and even online looking for a book that had an African American girl in a wheelchair on the cover, and quickly discovered there was nothing. It simply did not exist.

So, I decided to take matters into my own hands…