8:00 A.M., 88 degrees: We rise and shine. We peek out the back window and see:
We are sad.
8:30 A.M., 94 degrees: After some donuts, I don my work jorts and $2 flippies.
9:00 A.M., 98 degrees: We pick and peel and sand the offending garage wall. We acknowledge it looks shitty. We are soaked with sweat.
9:15 A.M., 101 degrees, no joke: I artfully arrange our weapons of the day.
10:30 A.M., 108 degrees: We complete Project Part One: Glidden Caribe. We squint eyes and tilt heads and hope for the best as we push onward, ever onward.
High noon, 115 degrees: Project Parts Two and Three — Glidden Ivy Topiary and Sliced Cucumber — applied. Jorts have been removed and your humble blogger is painting in a swimsuit. Hubs loses three pounds of water weight in an hour.
3:00 P.M., 400 degrees, hellish humidity: Project Part Four — Martha’s Acuaba Teal — is complete and touch-ups have been applied. Eyes squint again, necks crane, painting duo agrees to never paint outdoors on such a hot day again, even if in a few hours we still think it looks weird.
4:00 P.M.: Eye pallets cleansed, we silly homeowners agree — the stripes Are Good.
Allow me to dazzle you with our amazing painting-in-the-line skillz, y’all. What, what!
Now, we are the proud owners of an outdoor living space that looks delightfully beachy, with a dash of Mexican restaurant. So much better than staring at a blah tan wall when we hang out on the patio. Bold move, right?