Towels: do you need one? Photo by Kevin Steinhardt, used under Creative Commons license. I’ve been wondering how other families feel about nudity at home. My husband and I are in the practice of walking around the house in various states of undress, and it’s never been a big deal.
However, our child is now a year old and we’ve been wondering when we’re “supposed” to cover up… or if we even need to. I’d love to hear how other folks have handled this: what did you say to your kids about nudity? — Doxie
How have you explained non-sexual nudity to your child? Does your kid ever see you naked?
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Comments on How does your family handle non-sexual nudity?
being naked is awesome, it’s something that you shouldn’t shy away from as your child gets older. Yet, show them it’s okay to be WHO YOU ARE. My parents never hid themselves and even though it was embarrassing when friends came over, i’m thankful for their openness and acceptance. not like they where naked ALL THE TIME, but often, and showed no shame. I carry that on as an adult and i too love to be naked. 🙂
I am so glad this question was asked! I think I read through all the comments so far. I thought I was pretty offbeat when I decided to teach my son the proper names for body parts! Ha! When I was growing up I was taught to ONLY be naked in the bathroom, alone right before and during a shower and never, ever EVER at any other time. This has made for some very akward situations such as being intimate with my husband, going to the doctor etc. I would never even wear a bathing suit in public! Not for money, not for sushi, not on your life! Oh the shame I would feel! Anyway, after giving birth to my son I have a slightly more respectful relationship with my body. Also, I attempted to breastfeed for a few weeks but he had some major health issues so I just pumped for a few months and we missed that time and bonding that I wanted:( Even though he is only 5 months old, I have a hard time undressing for a shower in front of him. I want to teach him that nakedness is natural and even appropriate sometimes. I’m so glad all you offbeat Mama’s are willing to share and normalize this for me 🙂 I’m sure I’ll never be a nudist but hopefully my son won’t grow up to have the same body issues that I still suffer from, Thanks!
I don’t know if this has already been said yet, but I read something somewhere that made a lot of sense to me. It said that there’s no need to “worry” about covering up until your child exhibits the desire to be covered up himself or herself and to have privacy. Sounds pretty good to me. Our 2.5 year old still showers with both of us and sees us naked quite a bit. Until she’s worried about it, I’m not going to worry about it.
I hated my parents being naked when I was a kid. It made me so uncomfortable. They were like ‘oh it’s just our bodies, it’s natural’, but I still didn’t want to see it. It was weird and embarrassing. I’m often naked in my own home with my partner, but if we had children, I’d stop being nude around them once they were school age ish.
My mother and father seperated when I was younger. My mother has never really been one to cover up. She doesn’t run around the house naked but if myself or my brothers need to talk to her while she’s getting ready in the bathroom, or in her room then we go in… she has no clothes on… there was a time when my youngest brother was about 10 where my mom started locking her door so he didn’t walk in and see her naked but it was such a weird thing she just gave up. I have gotten the same attitude with my son, my husband will walk around nakid from dawn til dusk and my son does the same I don’t care for being naked because I’m always cold but if my son wants to come in and talk to me when I’m getting changed I don’t care… we shower as a family and everything haha I’m sure it will change as he gets older but I don’t think it matters that much at all!
we walk around naked in our house with our 2.5 year old son and our 5 month old.. He always looks at me when I’m naked and points to me and says “is that your pee pee mommy” I say, “girls don’t have a pee pee but that’s where I go pee pee” he looks at my husband and says the same thing. We make it as natural as possible and try not to make it a big deal. I remember showering with my parents when I was little. I like to create a safe atmosphere where nudity is normal, we even let him walk around the backyard naked, be free little ones while you can!!
This is a great topic! Nudity was never really an issue in my house growing up either, like alot of the commenters. My mom was more modest than my dad, but I think that’s just her personality. My dad never got awkward about his nudity when I got older though. Most of the time it was me going, “God Dad! I have friends coming over! Put some pants on!” At least he compromised with boxers…
We are not shy about being naked in our household, I have 3 boys 9, 5, and 2 years old. They see me and their dad naked alot, and I let them go naked as well no big deal. Even we go naked out in our backyard and we live nearby this beach where we go naked at too.
My daughter is 18mths old and my husband handles her bathing and bedtime routine because he works from 11am-10pm every night and this is the only time he has to spend with her. Often time he’ll run a little water in the tub and let her play for a bit and then he’ll get into the shower with her. It’s comfortable for us and he loves being able to play with her and utilize his small amount of time for himself as well (also I get a 30 minute break to myself every night). Some of our friends have asked us when we’re going to stop this family bathing. I really don’t know now but I’m sure we’ll know when it’s time.
My parents were never wandering around the house naked, but in underwear or a towel (especially to grab clothes out of the dryer or something), sure. Mom never just sat around in underwear, but if she was on her period there was no question because she didn’t cover up the bottom then either. Dad wandered/sat around in his underwear and shirtless all the time. My older brother was usually a little more modest that I remember, but I earned the nickname “Lady Godiva” with no shame. I would put panties on to sit around, but running from one place in the house to another while naked–or streaking because I felt like it and then getting slightly dressed again–was a normal occurrence. No one ever indicated that there was an issue, though I’m sure as a small child I was probably informed in no uncertain terms that clothes stay on outside the house because I don’t even remember any issues at daycare or anything. I may have even just learned through observation that like inside voices and outside voices, there were some things you could wear at home, and other things you should wear in public.
Actually come to think of it I remember being told on the way out the door once that I needed to put a shirt on because I was running around in just shorts. I thought it wasn’t fair that my brother didn’t have to wear a shirt, and I remember vividly being told that no, it’s not fair, but society expects certain things that you just kind of have to deal with.
My partner and I shower together and have discussed the “someday” situation of having to either take turns to give us non-baby time, or bring the kid(s) with us into the shower. I suspect that with any given situation, we will do a combination of both. More from the “I’ll get the baby ready while you shower, then you pack the car while I get cleaned up” sort of situations than the “kid shouldn’t see the other gender’s nudity” thing. I sleep naked as often as I don’t, we plan to co-sleep and bedshare, and sometimes my fibromyalgia means I’m sitting around in as little as I can. OTOH, I wear a robe or put on a tanktop and shorts when the roomies are home, so if we’re living with other folks when the babies happen then they might learn something entirely different. Not sure.
I am so happy I came across this post. My husband and I like to walk around nude and we’ve been talking about what we’re going to do when our daughter is born in a few months.
I’m all for continuing my nudist state (since my family did the same when I was a kid and it was never weird), and I just sent this post to my husband to see where he stands.
Thanks for bringing this topic to light!
My dad started covering up when I was 7 or so, my mom still doesn’t. I like it that way, I am very comfortable with my body and frequently will be naked just because I feel like it. My boyfriend gets a huge kick out of it after being used to girlfriends who were very body conscious. I grew up knowing what a real woman’s body looked like. I’m sure there are many kids that thing that the norm is what they see on the covers of magazines.
My 15-yo son is extremely prudish and does not even go shirtless around family. My 10-yo daughter is more laissez-faire, occasionally changing in front of me or her brother when it’s expedient. We have a housemate, so we generally don’t walk around in the nude anyway. I am not terribly bashful around my kids; I try to send them a message that the nude body is not a shameful thing. I don’t flaunt, but I don’t cower from changing clothes in front of them if needed.
I wonder whether, 4 years on, your son is still as guarded over visibility of his flesh as he was, and whether he recalls the reasons why he was. To not even go shirtless suggests a self-esteem and negative body image issue, which would have been something that some people or events or too much porn would have cultivated in him, sadly.
He may think that he will never be a time when he will consider being able to take his top off could possibly be a big deal. But I think any of us who are around the middle-aged part of our lives know how you eventually stop giving a shit what other people think about your body, but lament more about the wasted youth spent in angst over the best physical form you were never going to be more beautiful than you were when you hated everything about yourself.
My husband and I have three daughters, ages 7, 12 and 15. My husband is very conservative around our daughters, he’s never nude in front of them, and even goes way out of his way to not be in his underwear around them.
I’m extremely casual about nudity around my daughters. If I’m in the shower at home it’s perfectly fine with me if they need to come into the bathroom to pee or brush their teeth or ask me a question. The same goes for if I’m just out of the shower and I’m standing there nude while drying off.
I’ve been taking my daughters swimming at a Y since my oldest daughter was 6 years old. We always shower after we swim. The showers are all out in the open of the women’s locker room, so my daughters are all used to showering in the nude around me and other females who are also showering in the nude.
I think that a women’s locker room is a great place for little girls and teen girls to get to see non-sexual female nudity and be exposed to a wide variety of different body-types.
My 15 year old is on the girls swim team and volleyball team. Group showering is an almost daily experience for my daughter and her teammates, as well as changing in and out of their swimsuits. Showering in the buff around the other girls was a little awkward for some of the girls on her teams at first. But my daughter was comfortable with it from day one because of her experience with group showering at the Y.
My daughters best friend is also on the girls swim team at school, and she has already told my daughter that she became comfortable with the showering and changing with the other girls on the team because she saw how comfortable and casual my daughter is with it.
Ideally all mothers would be a good example for their daughters by not being ashamed to be nude in front of them or any other females in locker room settings!
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being naked is awesome, it’s something that you shouldn’t shy away from as your child gets older. Yet, show them it’s okay to be WHO YOU ARE. My parents never hid themselves and even though it was embarrassing when friends came over, i’m thankful for their openness and acceptance. not like they where naked ALL THE TIME, but often, and showed no shame. I carry that on as an adult and i too love to be naked. 🙂
I am so glad this question was asked! I think I read through all the comments so far. I thought I was pretty offbeat when I decided to teach my son the proper names for body parts! Ha! When I was growing up I was taught to ONLY be naked in the bathroom, alone right before and during a shower and never, ever EVER at any other time. This has made for some very akward situations such as being intimate with my husband, going to the doctor etc. I would never even wear a bathing suit in public! Not for money, not for sushi, not on your life! Oh the shame I would feel! Anyway, after giving birth to my son I have a slightly more respectful relationship with my body. Also, I attempted to breastfeed for a few weeks but he had some major health issues so I just pumped for a few months and we missed that time and bonding that I wanted:( Even though he is only 5 months old, I have a hard time undressing for a shower in front of him. I want to teach him that nakedness is natural and even appropriate sometimes. I’m so glad all you offbeat Mama’s are willing to share and normalize this for me 🙂 I’m sure I’ll never be a nudist but hopefully my son won’t grow up to have the same body issues that I still suffer from, Thanks!
I don’t know if this has already been said yet, but I read something somewhere that made a lot of sense to me. It said that there’s no need to “worry” about covering up until your child exhibits the desire to be covered up himself or herself and to have privacy. Sounds pretty good to me. Our 2.5 year old still showers with both of us and sees us naked quite a bit. Until she’s worried about it, I’m not going to worry about it.
I hated my parents being naked when I was a kid. It made me so uncomfortable. They were like ‘oh it’s just our bodies, it’s natural’, but I still didn’t want to see it. It was weird and embarrassing. I’m often naked in my own home with my partner, but if we had children, I’d stop being nude around them once they were school age ish.
My mother and father seperated when I was younger. My mother has never really been one to cover up. She doesn’t run around the house naked but if myself or my brothers need to talk to her while she’s getting ready in the bathroom, or in her room then we go in… she has no clothes on… there was a time when my youngest brother was about 10 where my mom started locking her door so he didn’t walk in and see her naked but it was such a weird thing she just gave up. I have gotten the same attitude with my son, my husband will walk around nakid from dawn til dusk and my son does the same I don’t care for being naked because I’m always cold but if my son wants to come in and talk to me when I’m getting changed I don’t care… we shower as a family and everything haha I’m sure it will change as he gets older but I don’t think it matters that much at all!
we walk around naked in our house with our 2.5 year old son and our 5 month old.. He always looks at me when I’m naked and points to me and says “is that your pee pee mommy” I say, “girls don’t have a pee pee but that’s where I go pee pee” he looks at my husband and says the same thing. We make it as natural as possible and try not to make it a big deal. I remember showering with my parents when I was little. I like to create a safe atmosphere where nudity is normal, we even let him walk around the backyard naked, be free little ones while you can!!
This is a great topic! Nudity was never really an issue in my house growing up either, like alot of the commenters. My mom was more modest than my dad, but I think that’s just her personality. My dad never got awkward about his nudity when I got older though. Most of the time it was me going, “God Dad! I have friends coming over! Put some pants on!” At least he compromised with boxers…
We are not shy about being naked in our household, I have 3 boys 9, 5, and 2 years old. They see me and their dad naked alot, and I let them go naked as well no big deal. Even we go naked out in our backyard and we live nearby this beach where we go naked at too.
My daughter is 18mths old and my husband handles her bathing and bedtime routine because he works from 11am-10pm every night and this is the only time he has to spend with her. Often time he’ll run a little water in the tub and let her play for a bit and then he’ll get into the shower with her. It’s comfortable for us and he loves being able to play with her and utilize his small amount of time for himself as well (also I get a 30 minute break to myself every night). Some of our friends have asked us when we’re going to stop this family bathing. I really don’t know now but I’m sure we’ll know when it’s time.
My parents were never wandering around the house naked, but in underwear or a towel (especially to grab clothes out of the dryer or something), sure. Mom never just sat around in underwear, but if she was on her period there was no question because she didn’t cover up the bottom then either. Dad wandered/sat around in his underwear and shirtless all the time. My older brother was usually a little more modest that I remember, but I earned the nickname “Lady Godiva” with no shame. I would put panties on to sit around, but running from one place in the house to another while naked–or streaking because I felt like it and then getting slightly dressed again–was a normal occurrence. No one ever indicated that there was an issue, though I’m sure as a small child I was probably informed in no uncertain terms that clothes stay on outside the house because I don’t even remember any issues at daycare or anything. I may have even just learned through observation that like inside voices and outside voices, there were some things you could wear at home, and other things you should wear in public.
Actually come to think of it I remember being told on the way out the door once that I needed to put a shirt on because I was running around in just shorts. I thought it wasn’t fair that my brother didn’t have to wear a shirt, and I remember vividly being told that no, it’s not fair, but society expects certain things that you just kind of have to deal with.
My partner and I shower together and have discussed the “someday” situation of having to either take turns to give us non-baby time, or bring the kid(s) with us into the shower. I suspect that with any given situation, we will do a combination of both. More from the “I’ll get the baby ready while you shower, then you pack the car while I get cleaned up” sort of situations than the “kid shouldn’t see the other gender’s nudity” thing. I sleep naked as often as I don’t, we plan to co-sleep and bedshare, and sometimes my fibromyalgia means I’m sitting around in as little as I can. OTOH, I wear a robe or put on a tanktop and shorts when the roomies are home, so if we’re living with other folks when the babies happen then they might learn something entirely different. Not sure.
I am so happy I came across this post. My husband and I like to walk around nude and we’ve been talking about what we’re going to do when our daughter is born in a few months.
I’m all for continuing my nudist state (since my family did the same when I was a kid and it was never weird), and I just sent this post to my husband to see where he stands.
Thanks for bringing this topic to light!
My dad started covering up when I was 7 or so, my mom still doesn’t. I like it that way, I am very comfortable with my body and frequently will be naked just because I feel like it. My boyfriend gets a huge kick out of it after being used to girlfriends who were very body conscious. I grew up knowing what a real woman’s body looked like. I’m sure there are many kids that thing that the norm is what they see on the covers of magazines.
My 15-yo son is extremely prudish and does not even go shirtless around family. My 10-yo daughter is more laissez-faire, occasionally changing in front of me or her brother when it’s expedient. We have a housemate, so we generally don’t walk around in the nude anyway. I am not terribly bashful around my kids; I try to send them a message that the nude body is not a shameful thing. I don’t flaunt, but I don’t cower from changing clothes in front of them if needed.
I wonder whether, 4 years on, your son is still as guarded over visibility of his flesh as he was, and whether he recalls the reasons why he was. To not even go shirtless suggests a self-esteem and negative body image issue, which would have been something that some people or events or too much porn would have cultivated in him, sadly.
He may think that he will never be a time when he will consider being able to take his top off could possibly be a big deal. But I think any of us who are around the middle-aged part of our lives know how you eventually stop giving a shit what other people think about your body, but lament more about the wasted youth spent in angst over the best physical form you were never going to be more beautiful than you were when you hated everything about yourself.
My husband and I have three daughters, ages 7, 12 and 15. My husband is very conservative around our daughters, he’s never nude in front of them, and even goes way out of his way to not be in his underwear around them.
I’m extremely casual about nudity around my daughters. If I’m in the shower at home it’s perfectly fine with me if they need to come into the bathroom to pee or brush their teeth or ask me a question. The same goes for if I’m just out of the shower and I’m standing there nude while drying off.
I’ve been taking my daughters swimming at a Y since my oldest daughter was 6 years old. We always shower after we swim. The showers are all out in the open of the women’s locker room, so my daughters are all used to showering in the nude around me and other females who are also showering in the nude.
I think that a women’s locker room is a great place for little girls and teen girls to get to see non-sexual female nudity and be exposed to a wide variety of different body-types.
My 15 year old is on the girls swim team and volleyball team. Group showering is an almost daily experience for my daughter and her teammates, as well as changing in and out of their swimsuits. Showering in the buff around the other girls was a little awkward for some of the girls on her teams at first. But my daughter was comfortable with it from day one because of her experience with group showering at the Y.
My daughters best friend is also on the girls swim team at school, and she has already told my daughter that she became comfortable with the showering and changing with the other girls on the team because she saw how comfortable and casual my daughter is with it.
Ideally all mothers would be a good example for their daughters by not being ashamed to be nude in front of them or any other females in locker room settings!