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“Homeowner”, “renter” or “squatter” – whatever the label, these occupants take the Offbeat wherever they go.

My same-sex marriage is as real as yours no matter what

My same-sex marriage is as real as yours no matter what happens

With all the movement towards marriage equality in Australia (and now speculation in the US again), I thought it was time to talk about and maybe even open a discussion about gay marriage. Luckily for me and my wife, it is recognized in America post-Obergefell v. Hodges. I have mentioned my upbringing as a late-bloomer in the South, and the fact that I was raised to believe marriage is between a man and a woman. Little did I realize, when hearing these things, that I would find myself deeply in love and married to a woman when I grew up. Falling in love with someone of the same sex really puts a dent in those childhood teachings…

I’m pregnant and in a metal band: how do I protect baby’s hearing?

I’m an audio engineer and an electric violinist for a metal band, and just found out that I’m pregnant. It’s early days, but do I need to cancel gigs after a certain point? As an engineer, I experience up to 105db at work, but generally staying under 90db. As a musician, though, I’m onstage next to drum kits and loud amps, including my own, for an average set of 50 minutes. Is there anything I can do to keep them safe without cancelling gigs?

These photos of moms & babes nursing in protest of family separation will hit you right in the FEELS

These photos of moms & babes nursing in protest of family separation will inspire you

For the past two Saturdays, a group of mamas and babies have gathered outside of the ICE detention center in Portland, OR to breast/bottle feed their babies in protest of the Trump administration policies that have separated roughly 2,000 children from their parents.

They were invited to hold the line during the nationwide Families Belong Together march on June 30th and decided to make it a weekly event until meaningful change happens in regards to ICE…

A love letter to my postpartum angel, my sister

A love letter to my postpartum angel, my sister

I never had much of a meaning for the term “angel” until my sister arrived in my bedroom at five in the morning after a seven-hour drive to be by my side right after I had just given birth for the first time. I felt guilty for pulling the alarm, but I was scared and confused and anxious — and she got it. She has two kids of her own, a partner, and a crazy work schedule… but she was there.

Cleaning, bringing meals, GTFO: what should you ACTUALLY do when visiting new parents?

Clean, bring meals, or GTFO: what should you ACTUALLY do when visiting new parents?

Way back in 2011, we published this post about the dos and don’ts of visiting friends after they have a baby and recently realized how GOLD the comments were.

Here’s advice straight from our readers about what you should actually do when visiting new parents…

I'm graduating and want to move: but who will care for my ailing parents?

I’m graduating and want to move: but who will care for my ailing parents?

I am a 22-year-old woman graduating from undergrad in a few short weeks. My parents are in their 50s and 60s and both have had a lot of health complications. They’re relatively stable, but because I’m their only child and I went to college locally, they have always relied on me for everything from helping with heavy household chores to emergency hospital visits. I know that I owe it to myself to live the life I want, which isn’t really possible where my parents reside, but at the thought of moving away, all I can think about is who would help them do all those things if I wasn’t there.

How do I make this choice without being selfish?

Swinging: an insider's perspective (plus how it differs from polyamory!)

Swinging: an insider’s perspective (plus how it differs from polyamory!)

I’ve been seeing lots of awesome posts about polyamory and ethical non-monogamy. I wanted to offer some thoughts on a variation that I haven’t seen talked much about yet: swinging.

Swinging or, “the lifestyle,” as we often refer to it with each other (sometimes indicated by a black ring on the right ring finger for those who like to advertise their proclivity), is one subculture among many with countless variations and expressions. Here is my personal perspective…

A reminder in difficult times: Love is an extraordinary and beautiful thing

A reminder in difficult times: Love is an extraordinary and beautiful thing

Each person expresses and feels love in many ways. We love people in our lives with different kinds of love — the love for a child, a parent, friends, and lovers. Each love is defined and felt in personal ways depending on who receives it. I have loved many people in many ways in my lifetime. Loving someone is a selfless endeavor. To love someone is to bare your soul. To trust that person with the deepest parts of you. Love is gentle and selfless and kind.

Here’s a reminder about love in these difficult times…