Category Archive

Families

Our sister site Offbeat Mama launched in 2009, became Offbeat Families in 2012, and was merged into Offbeat Home & Life in 2015. This archive contains all the posts ever published on those sites! We believe that while children change your life forever, being around kids doesn’t necessitate abandoning your identity. We believe in supporting and inspiring parents and caregivers who are moving beyond mainstream visions of parenting. We welcome anyone who’s interested in families, whether you’re pre-parental, in the process of becoming a parent, or choosing to live childfree.

michphoto

A wizard is born: my overdue unmedicated hospital birth story

In the days past my due date we had tried pretty much every home remedy natural induction technique. Evening primrose oil, raspberry leaf tea, walking, pineapple, sex, chocolate cake, yoga ball, acupressure, Chinese food but nothing had worked. I had made the choice through my pregnancy not to have any cervical checks so I had no idea how “ready” my body was getting, apart from lots of Braxton Hicks and prodromal labor, although the Doctor had concerns that I may not dilate properly due to a previous LEEP surgery.

8080784727 26360b8c1e n

What are the best plus-size options for baby-wearing?

I am expecting my second son and I think it would really help my chaotic life if I was able to cart this kiddo around without a stroller. My first son had some health issues that made baby wearing not a possibility for us, so I do not have much experience picking the best options. Since I am a big gal I’m wondering if some products work better for larger bodies. My partner is also chubby and proud so suggestions for big papas would also be helpful!

6863541116 cbb92de7d4 n

We didn’t think we wanted to know our baby’s sex — then we did

I was absolutely fine with keeping the sex of our baby a surprise. Really, I was. But then something happened to me around 22 weeks. I suddenly had a deep desire to know exactly what sort of babe was moving around in there. I felt detached and found it strange to say “the baby kicked me” and “do you want to feel the baby?” I needed a pronoun. More than that, I wanted a name. (We had a short list of lovely girl names to choose from, but absolutely no boy names. Which of course meant that we were definitely having a boy. In my head at least.)

Brass No Smoking Sign by BrassAttics

How can I diplomatically talk to my in-laws about smoking around my kid?

I feel very strongly that I don’t want my child to spend time in my in-laws home. I love my in-laws. They are kind, generous people, and I absolutely would want my kid to have a relationship with them. The problem is that they are very heavy (cigarette) smokers who smoke (a lot) inside their home. Every time I go to their home, the smell of smoke assaults me at the door and lingers on my clothes and hair so that I pretty much have to shower immediately when I leave their home and sometimes have to sit outside to get away from it so I can breathe properly.

4018385133 cd8e30b264

A US military pre-op trans woman and fiancée ponder parenthood

As a pre-op trans woman struggling with life in the US Armed Forces (while “Don’t ask, don’t tell” is not gone, transgender people are still forced to live in the dark) who had just arrived at a new command with no friends, no idea what I was in for, and no clue who I could trust. A dream of a woman — who was also fairly new to the command — entered into my life. At the time I assumed I had no chance with her. Even if I did, all the heartbreak I had experienced over the years had left me believing that the women I’m attracted to never understand my journey as a transgender woman, and are never willing to help me through the issues I deal with on a daily basis.

3274279516 9ab93fe9ed e1379917885597

I’m a new Pagan and I’m expecting: how do I continue to explore both identities?

My husband and I have recently found that that after a mere six months of marriage I’m pregnant. We’re happy but surprised: we were told by my doctor that conceiving would be more difficult since I have Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). I’ve recently decided to explore the path of Wicca, but since I’m new to Wicca and pregnancy I’m lost.

7390779774 d3bd65dde6 c

My happy hospital birth story

For a few hours I tried to get comfortable through the contractions — moving in different positions, trying to lay down, taking a bath, etc. I thought, I MUST be dilated more, I MUST! Let’s go back to the hospital!

3321258571 9b3ef839a1 o

8 ways to help you deal when the time isn’t right to have a baby

It was never going to happen to me like it did with those parents who hit the one-year mark, watch their little baby toddle around and say, “Oh… I want another one!” After a terrible pregnancy that ended in an emergency C-section, I decided I was done for good. Or at the very least a good looooong time. I wrote myself letters throughout the pregnancy to remind myself that YES it was that bad, the same way I kept track of the (still ongoing) night wakings, issues with breastfeeding. Finances have been kept under strict supervision, and baby expenditures can be easily totalled.