Category Archive

lil kids

They really say just about anything: readers share their favorite kid quotes

Kids are notorious for saying all kinds of random shit — the phrase “kids say the darndest things” doesn’t exist for no reason. My own son had us literally LOLing recently, so I shared what he said on the Offbeat Mama Facebook page.

5 suggestions for playing safely when your “yard” is a parking lot

We moved into an apartment last year and I noticed something odd: two of the buildings have smushed patches behind them that could count as yards — one unit inexplicably has a back door, even — but it’s not in a place where the kids can really play safely and supervised. What’s the alternative? The parking lot? With cars?!

7 tips for helping your child focus on their health — not the number on the scale

Throughout my elementary years I was a pudgy kid. By the time my lingering baby fat had fallen off I had learned to think of myself as overweight, unattractive, and lazy. I wore layers to hide my body, never went swimming in a group, and was a chronic dieter until my early twenties when I essentially stopped eating altogether. I eventually climbed out of that hole but here I am at twenty-six and I find myself feeling like that fat kid all too easily.

What geeky books do you plan to share with your kids?

I maybe did a happy dance in my chair when I found a link to Wired’s 67 Books Every Geek Should Read to Their Kids Before Age 10… hello, BOOK NERD DREAM! I thought it’d be fun to talk about a few books that made their list (talking about all 67 would be a little lengthy, y’all) and dish about which books we each plan to share with our kids before the ‘tween years kick in.

The magic of childhood is kind of totally freaky

Why do we insist on scaring the living daylights out of our children with the Magic of Childhood? It’s no wonder they’re all in a hurry to grow up. You would be too, if every time a milestone or major holiday came around it was marked by somebody sneaking into your home or bedroom at night, and either leaving something behind or taking a body part of yours.

Offbeat Mama Kid’s Mix Vol 1: songs for and about the road

Since pregnancy, and possibly even before, I’ve been determined that my child wouldn’t listen to those CDs of kids singing covers of pop songs in kid voices. There’s nothing inherently WRONG with those CDs, but I have zero interest, possibly even less than zero interest, in ever playing one in my home or my car. While I was pregnant and putting together for my never-used labor and birth playlist, I wondered if it’d be easy to get my son to like whatever we like — and now that I have a three-year-old, I have learned that it is. I know this won’t last forever (and god only knows what the 2020s hold for his teenage-hood), but for now? TOTALLY WORKS.

Where do you draw the line when blogging about your family?

Cat recently wrote a fascinating piece on Offbeat Home called My door is open: why I’m pretty public online about my home. In it she discusses the transparency with which she blogs about where she lives and what she does. Cat’s digital reach in the home-focused community is pretty far — she runs two websites (the other being Hipster Housewife) about homes, and tweets many, many details about her life every single day. In fact, within another month or so I might have her whole TV schedule worked out. (I KID! Kind of.)

Sex Ed and the four-year-old

One summer evening, I piled the kids into the car for a pre-bed ice cream run. As we’re waiting in an impossibly long drive thru line, my 4 year old pipes up from the backseat, “Mommy, turn this music down. I need to talk about things.”

I cooperate and turn the radio off, asking what she wants to talk about.

“Let’s talk about babies.”