Second marriage is not a dirty word: finding new love and marriage after divorce
Divorce is an ugly and catastrophic personal experience. You have to find a way to let go of the past and move forward, learning from what you have been through. The next relationship may be scary, the possibility of finding a happily ever after could be dismal. But finding happiness is worth the risk of letting someone in. I withstood divorce and came out on the other side, so I thought I would give you a few reasons why you shouldn’t give up on love or marriage after divorce…
Growing up Southern as a lesbian late bloomer
When you’re raised in a way that shields you from anything that’s different, it really alters your ability to think outside of the small little box that’s your world. Had I met someone when I was younger who was gay or bisexual, maybe there would have been bells and whistles going off and I wouldn’t have been clueless for so long. Who knows? But I was blind for a very very long time. I met a guy who I married, had a couple of kids, and that’s how the story was supposed to go…
…only it didn’t.
I feel like a “bad mom” for giving up residential custody
I strongly believe that one gender does not parent better than the other. I fully believe men are just as good at parenting as women when put in the same situations. And that the societal idea that men are idiots when it comes to kids and don’t know what they are doing is ignorant.
So why is it that, as a strong feminist, I cannot help shake the guilt that I am sending my child away, or that I am a failure or a bad mom if I let my daughter live with her father?
It’s been six months since leaving my husband for another man…
It has been six months since I left my husband for another man… Six months that I have been paying for my choice through reduced access to my most amazing children ever. Six months that I have been experiencing the utmost happiness, while also experiencing the most gut wrenching guilt. Six months where I have stayed silent on this topic because of the guilt and fear of being judged for what I did.
I’m not staying silent anymore…
The best way to finalize your breakup: With a bad-ass “self love photoshoot”
When Jessi first approached me about taking some photos for her I jumped at the chance. My first question was “What are we celebrating?” She responded that her divorce was days away from being finalized, and she wanted to end it on a high note instead of crying over spilt milk.
What I’m learning from dancing poorly
Inspired by a local dancer’s athletic performance in a show I saw years ago, I asked her if she would teach me some stuff. She said she would, and then I cried a lot because it’s really hard looking stupid and learning new things. METAPHOR ALERT!
Memoirist ethics, aka how to write your story without being a dick about it
A reader asks Ariel: “As you write your memoir following your divorce, how do you write about it honestly while also protecting your son and (if you even want to) your ex-husband?”
Food that FEELS good vs food that just tastes good
As you may have heard, last year I got divorced. One of the big shifts I dealt with after the split was adapting to solo food preparation duties… and in fact, completely relearning my relationship with hunger, food, and nourishing myself.
A big part of this shift was relearning how food feels in my body…