I do know that I will love my child, and so will both sides of the family, Deaf and hearing, regardless of whether they are born deaf or hearing. I know that we will adapt and I will, along with the child, learn better communication with everyone. I know this child will be a joy and a terror. This child will experience love and loneliness no matter where they go in life, and I will try to teach them to embrace the good and bad, and to accept or fight against certain situations. I try to explain this to my partner, and I try not to worry.
I’m completely deaf in my right ear, and I’m a parent to a toddler and a preschooler. I need to be able to read lips to most effectively hear people when they speak, and preschoolers are notoriously unintelligible in the best of circumstances. I try to teach my kids to look at my face when they speak so I can hear them, but it doesn’t often work.
For a long time, I wondered whether I should become a parent — whether it was fair to subject my children to the difficulty of having a deaf mother. I know this sentiment will surprise those close to me but there it is: my secret insecurity laid bare.