Category Archive


Lara: From Medieval-inspired handfasting to separating, and learning to start over

Wow, where do I start! If anyone had told me, three years ago, that this is how things would end up, I’d never have believed them, but there’s only one constant in life and that is change. I suppose I had what you might consider a small, early, mid-life crisis.

How to make the breaking up and moving out process as respectful as possible

I’m breaking up with my partner of four years (cohabiting for two) and we’re moving into separate spaces. How do I make the breaking up and moving out process as (relatively) painless and respectful as possible? Is there even a way?

Realizing that “long-term relationship” is a choice

I’m 28, and my friend circle (both close and extended) is definitely experiencing the first wave of divorces. As someone who regularly contemplated divorce for two years, I can see the appeal: freeeeeeeeeedom. I’m also someone who is adamantly pro-divorce: if it’s not working and you want out, get out. To me, divorce is nothing to be ashamed of regardless of the reasons leading up to it. But yet… I remain un-divorced. Like I said, I’m even happy about it. Why?

Should we get divorced but stay together?

When my husband and I weren’t married I had “zero” income. Now that we’re married and I’m on his healthcare and I’m trying to continue my education I’m realizing that my low/no income healthcare was far better than actually being insured. And now I’m worried about me receiving enough aid to finish school. Has anyone else thought about just getting a divorce on paper in order to reap the financial benefits?

How to have hard conversations like a pro

As an attorney, a lot of my job is helping people have hard conversations. Over years of facilitating these tough conversations, I’ve come up with some steps that make them more productive and less painful. These aren’t just good for “legal” conversations — they can work for anything from talking about moving cross-country for a job to planning a birthday party!

Exploring the very painful world of friendship breakups

Whether because of a fight, distance, or natural causes, friendship death can be especially painful. Unlike romantic relationships, we don’t expect friendships to have expiration dates. There are no “where are we going?” conversations, no breakup war stories, no vows or pronouncements in front of friends and family. Friendships are what you turn to when you end a romantic relationship; they’re there when you begin a new one. Friendships, it’s understood, are forever. Why wouldn’t they be? But the most painful breakup I’ve ever had wasn’t with a romantic partner.

I love you but leave: evicting a good roommate

I’m a grad student, and I currently live in a flat with another grad student, who’s been living here over a year.

The problem is, my boyfriend will be coming back into the country in a few months and would really like to move in with me. I’m trying to find a supportive, non-pressuring way to ask my flatmate if she can commit to moving out on a particular date so he can move in…How do I work this?