8 sloth shower curtains that make life worth living

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#Decor & Decorating#Shopping#bathrooms#geeky#shower

stripper sloth shower curtainAre you seeing what I’m seeing? That right there is a stripper sloth clearly doing so good of a job that the audience is making it rain… on a shower curtain. I never knew that my life was missing something until I saw this magical item… that exists in the world… and can be purchased… and hung in my bathroom.

Oh but Homies, would you believe me if I told you that is not the end of the wonderous sloth shower curtain joy in this world? No! There are so many more amazing sloth shower curtains to be purchased and hung. Check these out…

sloth shower curtainForget stripping, a real sloth would be doing exactly this in your bathroom.

party sloth shower curtain Nap all day. Sleep all night. Party FOREVER with this bad-ass sloth shower curtain.

hanging sloth shower curtainWhat’s that sloth doing in your bathroom? Just hanging out.

yoga sloth shower curtainDid you know you could combine your love of yoga and your love of sloths and your love of bathing? Yup. You can.

titanic sloth shower curtainTITANIC SLOTH!!!! Too soon? Pssh, I say too perfect.

ModSloth Shower CurtainOr maybe you prefer your giant sloth attacks in a more populated area. Why yes, that is a King Sloth in my bathroom.

sloth from the Goonies shower curtainDon’t forget everyone’s favorite Sloth — Sloth from The Goonies! Oh I went there, with this Sloth “Notorious Baldies” shower curtain.

About the Author: Megan Finley Horowitz

@meggyfin @meggyfin

I'm a 40-year-old potty-mouthed writer with late-diagnosed ADHD and a shit-ton of anxiety. I live in my hometown of Los Angeles with a husband, a daughter I never planned on having, and a senior rescue dog. Anything else you need to know can be gleaned from my instagram and my TikTok.

Comments on 8 sloth shower curtains that make life worth living

  2. I have the most amazing image of the Offbeat Home editorial team, planning your week of posts.

    Megan: “Guys… guys. I have the best idea for a post. It’s about shower curtains.”
    Ariel: “Shower curtains are boring. Could you be more specific?”
    Megan: “SLOTHS. SLOTH-THEMED SHOWER CURTAINS. I found eight of them.”
    Ariel: “…It’s so crazy it just might work. I love it!”

    This post actually really makes me want to pull a Kristen Bell and get all excited about sloths and the shower curtains they’re featured on

  5. I have a 5 year old who really likes sloths, but I think this might be going a little overboard. Her older sister has to share that bathroom with her. But I must say, it would never have occurred to me that there even were enough sloth-themed shower curtains to warrant an article.

    For what it’s worth, if I were to get one I’d go with number 4. And her reaction would probably be awesome.

  6. I can’t believe that first one is real (except I kind of can)! I can just picture my husband’s reaction if I were to insist we get it:

    Me: Sloth stripper shower curtain! We have to have it!
    Him: *laughs nervously*

  10. I love sloths even more in German – the literal translation is “lazy-animal.” (Faultier) So I guess as long as I can still be head lazy-animal in my house, I could let one in on a shower curtain for company…

  11. Did anyone else read the reviews for the stripper sloth shower curtain? This is my favorite one:

    “This is the best purchase I could have made for my home. After I attached this to the shower rod with the utmost of ease, with the hooks that are included, I immediately noticed how intimate my bathroom seemed to be. All that I am lacking now is a smoke machine and my stack of ones. The only reason I didn’t give this six stars is that my girlfriend got quite jealous of me looking at Candy all day. She also didn’t appreciate that I named her Candy.”

    • I’ve been LOLing my way through this whole post, but that last comment made me utterly lose it. Homies, you are the comic relief awesomeness I didn’t know I needed so badly.

  20. Guys you don’t even know…. These shower curtains, they have all kinds of amazing ones! My husband-Elect (thanks obb for the term) and I were looking for regular curtains to go over our sliding glass door, and couldn’t find anything we really liked. We wanted thermal curtains, because Michigan, but they were all so boring. Then I stumbled upon these amazing shower curtains, abs realized that since of them are just fabric, not vynal, and I had an epiphany! One of those curtain rods that lets you hang two rows of curtains, a regular old black thermal curtain, and a fabric shower curtain with an amazing graphic of this wicked looking tribal owl, bracketed by two smaller shower curtains with the galaxy printed on them, and we have the coolest flippin cosmic space owl curtains that you ever did see.

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