Helene Cohen Bludman recently published a poignant piece about what life is like after your kids have grown and moved away — when the house is silent, and you’re still going from room to room and cleaning up after children who have become adults:
“Don’t forget to text me when you land,” I call out as he lugs his bag over the curb and makes his way to the entrance. He turns to wave, then disappears into the crowd of holiday travelers.And with that, the last of my three children has left the family nest for a home many miles away.
I come back to a house that is much too quiet, devoid of the shrieks of laughter, good-natured ribbing and late night comings and goings that marked my children’s stay over the holiday season. My husband is already going from room to room, picking up a stray sock or an empty soda can, getting our house back in order. Tomorrow I will return to my normal routine, but tonight, I will wallow in a bit of sadness.
My son and two daughters have grown up to be delightful young adults, funny, thoughtful, affectionate. We have great times together.Problem is, we just don’t see each other all that often.
You can read the entire piece at Huffington Post.
I just recently lost my grandmother, who moved away from all of us when they retired. Compared to when I lost my other grandmother who lived an hour away, the mourning experience was drastically different.
That being said, I think the important thing is to keep in touch the best you can. There’s nothing wrong with moving away, but there’s so much that we can do now with technology to bridge the gap.
I love this piece!!! I live 4000 from my parentsand I miss them and they miss me. But they always say something along the lines of this “Because as much as I miss them, I am proud of them for being self-confident and adventurous. I admire their sense of independence. I love that they are savoring new experiences and learning about different parts of the world. Knowing that they are healthy and happy and living life to the fullest is truly the best feeling a parent can have.”
When I was a post-college single, I followed my wanderlust and my career. And I’m so glad I did; I’ve had experiences and made friends I never would have if I’d stayed closer to home. But now that I’m married and trying to start a family, I find myself looking at jobs in my home state to be nearer to my family. If I find a way to stay in my career field and live down the road from my mom? Perfection.
There really is something about “going home again”. After 10+ years of living away from my hometown I now live 10 miles from my folks. Just far enough away to avoide the pop-in, but close enough that I can see them when ever I want. Perfection!