Motherhood: my most difficult rite of passage yet
Five years ago this happened. I thought, “Oh, fuck. What have I gotten myself into?” The look on my face says it all. The postpartum depression hadn’t yet kicked in and I was trying to wrap my brain around this new reality. What I didn’t know was that I was about to undertake the most arduous and difficult rite of passage of my life. Parenthood.
How do I teach privilege to my able-bodied, white male children?
My partner and I recently welcomed our miracle twin newborns to the world and we’re thrilled! But also terrified. Somehow we managed to bring two more blond-haired, blue-eyed, males into our rural Midwest society (we are both of primarily European ancestry, but we never expected this!).
We had always planned to teach our children to value diversity and to challenge the system of privilege, but now we’re looking at raising children who are the textbook image of privilege. Help! How can we do parenting right?
I’ve been married for three years and I still can’t pick a married last name
It happens all the time. Someone will look at me, ask for my name, and I’ll panic. What is my name here? My doctor and my library know me as Ms. My-Last-Name. Our dog groomer and favorite restaurant know me as Mrs. His-Last-Name. My bank knows me as both. And at some point, my gym changed my name to match my husband’s, but I forget and give them the wrong name every time. Who am I this time?
My mother abandoned me and my life was forever changed
I was just a regular teenage girl one moment and then a wreck the next. All I had to worry about in life was what outfit I would have to wear to school the next day and what grades I got in my classes. But that all changed in just one day.
My mom had been going through a rough patch and her depression had gotten the worst of her. One day she just vanished into thin air…
16 breakup TV shows to binge watch your way back to life
Remember my big roundup of best breakup movies to soothe your poor broken heart? It’s time to dive down the boob tube rabbit hole to find the most bingeable breakup TV shows.
Grab your favorite snack (40 lb. bag of cereal marshmallows, perhaps?) and get to watching…
My husband doesn’t want kids: how do I cope with his choice?
My husband recently told me he definitively doesn’t want children. I knew he’d been leaning that way over the past few years so we’ve been waiting. Silly me, I’d always thought he’d eventually change his mind. If I’m honest my heart is quite broken. I’ve always looked forward to being a parent. How do I move from wanting a child to child-free?
My poly tips for working with jealousy (even if you’re not polyamorous!)
A theme in poly articles I see a lot: non-monogamy requires so much effort — likely too much effort for most of us. And I have a growing appetite for unpacking our assumptions that non-monogamy is so much harder than other ways of being in relationship.
I’m not here to tell you that scheduling time with and navigating the feelings of multiple partners doesn’t require a lot of work, or even that I think everyone needs to want to do the kind of work polyamory requires. Non-monogamy isn’t a one-size-fits-all approach any more than monogamy is and both require dedication and communication…
The Mom Tribe: as a mom, you are never alone
When I was pregnant 11 years ago, I knew I was clueless. I was young and naïve and really didn’t have the slightest idea what being a parent would entail. I don’t think I could even comprehend past diapers and breastfeeding. I read every book that I could, studies and research, and all the information I could to be prepared for one of the biggest journey’s of my life. None of that helped. Nothing can prepare for what life as a mom is like. I remember the day the nurse put this little guy in my arms and that was it. My heart filled up. I looked into those eyes and knew my world was no longer just my own.
My purpose found me. And I found the Mom Tribe.