How can I make sure my step-kids have friends when they visit us in the summer?
I have never wanted bio-kids of my own, but I fell in love with a father and now I have two step-kids who I love to pieces! They live full time with their bio-mom and her family and currently are overseas because of the military, so we keep in touch via phone calls, Skype, packages, and very infrequent visits. We just got the news that they will be moving back to the States (yay!) and our visitation will become more frequent and regular. We have a great relationship, but I want them to really feel like our house is their other home, and I especially want them to have social support and friends in our community who they will be able to return to on summers and school holidays.
My son might be gay and we live in a conservative town: where can I find resources for him?
Since he could ask for it, my son has asked to dress up in girl’s clothing — pink and frilly, pretty and shiny. It’s the only kind of clothing he gets excited about besides snazzy boy’s dress shirt. To him, all other clothing serves only to keep him from being totally naked. This is ok with me, aside from fighting my own society embedded fears that make my first instinct to keep it in the house only (which has been going well).
All the grandparents want to visit all the time! How do we manage long-distance family visits?
We live on the West Coast, and the grandparents (my in-laws, my mother, my father and my step mom) live in three different East Coast cities. My eight-month-old son is the ONLY grandchild on either side. The grandparents are (understandably!) enthusiastic and each set wants to visit every couple of months, which adds up to a LOT of travel and/or house guests.
How do I explain my sister’s polyamorous relationship to my kid?
My sister (who lives just a few miles away and is very involved in my life and the life of our large extended family) is part of an open polyamorous quad. All four individuals live together in the same house and one of the women (not my sister) is expecting a baby in the fall. Once baby arrives, I know that it will (and should) become apparent to my two oldest children that these people are more than roommates.
My husband is transitioning to female and we want to have kids: how can we make this work?
My husband and I have always been happy to blur the gender lines, but he (current preferred pronoun!) recently told me that he identifies as transgender and wants to transition to presenting as female.
How can we create a kid-friendly zone in a small city apartment?
K has already said that he will miss his backyard mud kitchen, and I don’t blame him. First of all: MUD! GLORIOUS MUD! Secondly, there is a lot of “No” in the life of a little kid. K’s mud kitchen is his world of “Yes!” He can make all of the mess he wants and experiment to his heart’s content without anyone fussing about set-up or clean-up or telling him what to do. Now he won’t have a back yard, so no more mud kitchen for him.
I want to donate my eggs but my partner’s wary: how can I help overcome his doubts?
Now that I’ve had my absolutely perfect son — he’s beautiful, healthy, and right on track developmentally — I think I would be ready to donate. But… my partner doesn’t really feel the same way. I’ve mentioned it to him and he didn’t like the idea, but I’d like one more shot to convince him.
How do you decide which beliefs to pass on to your child?
While discussing all things family related with my fiancee, we were debating whether or not we should raise the kids vegan (I’m vegan, she’s not) or according to my religious beliefs (she’s agnostic and doesn’t follow anything specifically). For us, as a queer couple, this opens some interesting dialogue because if we end up adopting and those kids are older, we don’t necessarily feel right imposing beliefs on someone who is of an age where they can make their own decisions.