Overcoming Imposter Syndrome as a polyamorous mom
Once upon a time, there was a woman. She lived in a polyamorous, sex-positive family. She liked people… just people in general. She thought they were beautiful, and loved to learn (and learned to love) the intricacies of their personalities. Physically, intellectually, emotionally — she saw their strengths and enjoyed them for what they were. But she couldn’t apply the same standards to herself.
Road tripping through South America with a newborn
Having a four-month maternity leave sounded great, but staying at home all that time was wearing me down. I am serious travel bug/wanderlust case and by the time our child turned one-month-old I was starting to get restless. So when my husband decided to quit his job a month later I told him: “If you are quitting, we are traveling!”
So… why have kids?
I am at the point in my life that I want to decide whether to have kids. In a logical sense, I am able and capable of having children. But I’m not completely satisfied with having kids merely because I can. So I am curious how people, who had the luxury of deciding, decided on having kids? Why should I grow my family?
How I learned to care less about my family and more about myself
My morning routine revolves entirely around my family. Most days I don’t bother eating breakfast, or making lunch for myself to take to work, because I am too focused on taking care of everyone else. While putting everyone before me can be considered a commendable trait, there is a part of me that realizes that there is a real issue with never allowing myself the opportunity to be important.
How my pink-loving son made me confront my weird gender biases
In our household, the lines of the past that steadfastly identified what was considered “man” and “woman” responsibilities were more opaque. It’s not the easiest job in the world, but to be honest I felt pretty good about being what most people would label a “modern dad” and I wore that title like a badge of honor. My title was put to the test however the day my wife brought a particular hula monkey toy home for my son…
Creating a safe and happy home in a dangerous space
We very intentionally moved to our current home after a series of not-quite-right trials elsewhere in the country. In such a site, we saw our lives unfolding with love, adventure, and fresh air. And then, we lived in the home for a year, and realized things were not the way they had first seemed. The less pleasant characteristics of our neighborhood began to creep in, and their severity ranged from small to glaring.
Avoiding turbulence: Keep in contact with family at home while traveling abroad
When we started planning our first international family trip, we had a few co-parenting hoops to jump through; negotiation and compromise is often the name of the co-parenting game. For this trip to happen, I had to assure my son’s father that he would continue to have the routine contact he enjoys in our daily life, and that we would keep him apprised of our travel plans. As I sat down to work all the kinks out in this travel agreement, I learned several valuable lessons we will continue to employ as we enjoy traveling as a family and keeping all branches of our family tree satisfied and smiling.
Having a baby didn’t stop us from touring with our band — we just bring him along
While there are plenty of things that haven’t made touring any more difficult with our baby, there are also plenty of considerations we take that probably seem first nature by now. We have to figure out nap times. We keep bedtime in mind. We’re always surveying our venues, hangouts, and potential non-motor-home sleeping quarters for baby-friendliness. Luckily, we’re self-sufficient: we have two forms of heat (propane and electric), plenty of blankets, and everything we need inside our mobile house.