Why only you can heal you (and why that's fucking awesome)

Here's how anxious attachment works: you grow up confusing the sensation of chasing attention with the feeling of love.

We adapted so well to unpredictable attention that it’s what we crave. Relationships that don’t involve chasing can feel boring…

1.9k

Individuation: stumbling toward emotional self-reliance

Maybe the most obvious way to talk about individuation is to say that, in the context of my marriage, if there was a bad feeling, I would look to my spouse to help me with it. Over the years, this mean that basically I held him at least partially responsible for my sense of well-being. Then, suddenly, my sense of well-being was very much my responsibility alone… and ultimately, it always was.

1.3k

Let's talk about talking about your "sex number"

The number of people I have slept with is higher than most women I've asked. At the end of the day, I'm not going to lie about my number — I am not ashamed. But I do wonder how I should talk about it in future dating scenarios.

Anyone else with a high sex number want to give me advice about talking open and honestly about it?

1.2k

Screw the "romantic mystique" — let's think about love

We base some of the biggest decisions of our lives on romantic love, and yet we resist actually examining love… for fear of overthinking it and somehow erasing its magic. FUCK THAT. We should all be thinking about this shit, since we all base huge life decisions on it. So, here's some of my recent research…