Category Archive

Families

Our sister site Offbeat Mama launched in 2009, became Offbeat Families in 2012, and was merged into Offbeat Home & Life in 2015. This archive contains all the posts ever published on those sites! We believe that while children change your life forever, being around kids doesn’t necessitate abandoning your identity. We believe in supporting and inspiring parents and caregivers who are moving beyond mainstream visions of parenting. We welcome anyone who’s interested in families, whether you’re pre-parental, in the process of becoming a parent, or choosing to live childfree.

How young is too young to teach kids about sexual objectification?

Recently, some situations have come up which make me, as an intersectional feminist, question how to speak to my sister, let alone my nieces, about sexual objectification. How young is too young to teach kids about sexual objectification? Beyond that, has anyone got any ideas on how to break down sexual objectification for young people to understand?

Is my offbeat lifestyle hurting my child?

In my town, like so many small towns, perception is everything. Thankfully over the years I’ve developed a thick skin. It didn’t matter to me what these people thought… until my daughter came into the picture. Then the fears ran rampant: Will she be invited to playdates? Will she be ashamed of me at parent-teacher meetings? Will she get in trouble for her inherited penchant for dark artwork? Is my outward appearance going to ruin her life? Will she hate me and wish I was a little more June Cleaver and a little less Morticia Addams?

Telling my Facebook-obsessed family I don’t want photos of my kid online

As I consider having a kid, one thing I feel very strongly about is not blasting photos of them all over social media. Preserving my future child’s privacy and right to choose is something I feel strongly about. But, I don’t even think something like that crosses my share-everything-on-Facebook family members’ minds. Any advice on how, or when, to broach this subject? I don’t want to become that mom who bites anyone’s head off who posts a photo of my kid on the internet. But I also want people to think before they post.

What not to say to an infertile person (even if they’re child-free!)

I’m infertile. There are a lot of unexpected emotions that come up when you’re infertile. I’ve been described as ultra-confident, and I still struggle with feelings of inadequacy. It can be tough to know what to say when you find out that someone is infertile. Here are a few common responses I’ve received, and why they’re problematic…

How do you deal with a parent with severe anxiety?

I love my mother. Which is why her anxiety disorder is so awful for me. She’s been like this for years– doing things like suggesting that everything I do will kill or harm my baby. But now her anxiety over everything is giving ME anxiety over everything. Does anyone have tips for dealing with a parent with severe anxiety?

I’m grieving for the kids that we now can’t have. How do I cope?

We’ve discovered that my mental health isn’t anywhere near as stable as I thought it was. And we had to make the difficult decision to stop trying to get pregnant. I know that this is the right choice to make, for my sanity if nothing else. But I feel like I’m grieving for the life we planned, and the kids that won’t be a part of it. Any advice?

Finding plus-size maternity clothes: A Canadian struggle, eh?

Once the bump started forming, and my regular clothes started tugging in weird places, it was time to take the journey into finding plus-size maternity clothes in Canada. Oh boy? Hooray? I had a gut feeling that things wouldn’t be all that easy and boy was I right.

Finding plus-size maternity clothing was a nightmare!

How do you deal with an adult bully in the family?

For about a decade, I’ve been handling a cycle of bullying from an in-law. It’s not exactly like a workplace bully — I can’t just quit my family. But I’d like to be able to not focus on this person while at family gatherings and somehow enjoy myself with the people there that I love. Anyone got any advice for this?