Surviving toddlerhood: sleep training, meal negotiating, and discovering How It Really Is
This child is not that child. This child is a warrior. This child narrows her eyes, pulls down her mask affixed to her Medieval spiked helmet and unsheathes her sword. This child licks her lips and spits on the ground, never breaking eye contact. “Hello, Mother,” she quietly growls through her binky. “Welcome to Hell.”
How do we break it to our family members that we’re Child-Free?
My husband and I recently tied to the knot, and here’s the thing: I love my mother-in-law. She is a super sweet woman… but she also wants more grandchildren. She has one, but she wants more. Here’s the catch: we’re not having any children. Ever.
Dealing with another parent shunning your teen
Last summer, my daughter wanted to celebrate her birthday by having her two best friends over for a slumber party. I emailed both moms with an invitation and some possible dates. One of them emailed back that it didn’t matter what the date was, because she didn’t feel comfortable having her daughter in my home. Ever. Following a different drummer is all well and good, until your kid gets shunned for it. Then the panic sets in.
A letter to my daughter about fighting back
I was absolutely struck by this recent piece by Sarah Tuttle-Singer about teaching our children to fight back — within reason. It’s all too easy to get caught up in the rules of parent and personhood: be nice. Try again. Make friends. Share.
Sometimes, even though those rules are still very important, being nice isn’t the appropriate response.
Stream of consciousness thoughts on failing at breastfeeding — and surviving
I barely pump anymore, although I can still feed my baby about an ounce of breast milk from one breast every other feeding or so. I’ve given up on my right breast — she’s such an underachiever. I’ll keep taking the prescriptions and supplements and keep hoping that I’m giving my baby girl SOME antibodies and nutrients, but for the most part, my child is fed, and yes nourished, by formula.
Plans have a way of unexpectedly changing when you’re part of a military family
The ability to live in the present is especially important for those of us who are dependents of military members because we have to live our lives in short increments. Our spouses are pretty much property of the U.S. Government, and we can’t really look too far into the future. So I am always starting some new project, volunteer job, or like now, searching for a real, paying job. If you asked where I see myself in five years, I have no idea — where do you see the U.S. Economy in five years?
Reactive Attachment Disorder: bonding with a wounded child
Progress took time — and the work of staying bonded with a wounded child is a life-time endeavor. That’s okay though because Julia has stepped out of the danger zone. She’s taken off her helmet and armor. She has let me become her mother.
Beauty in sadness: reflecting on the hospice in which my mother passed away
My mother, an RN since 1968, was a pioneer of childbirth education in the 1970s, 80s and 90s. She was one of the first people in Texas to ever teach Lamaze as an alternative to childbirth while under anesthesia (the status quo of the 1970s). She earned her Masters in Nursing while my brother and I were in high school. She wrote hundreds of articles about comfort methods during pregnancy and childbirth, about exercise during pregnancy, and childcare in the first year of life. When she was admitted to Christus Sister Mary Hospice on September 21, 2012, she had spent the last five months in hospitals and skilled nursing facilities battling heart valve failure and congestive heart failure.