My husband and I got married not too long ago. It so happens that one of our long-time friends, also from our home town, found a part time job in the city I work in, and we've decided to share a flat. Offbeat Homies my questions are many…
This is Offbeat Home's archive of roommates posts.
I currently live in a house with four roommates and our lease is up at the end of October. Here's our problem… Everyone wants to stay in the house, but none of us want to stay with our one roommate. The other three of us want to kick her out, but we aren't sure how to without backlash. What is a good and formal but polite way to tell her she isn't wanted anymore?
The truth is that my flatmates and I are pretty good about evenly sharing work. The truth is, when I did the dishes it was usually totally my turn. The truth is, when I was angsting about dishes, probably my flatmates were angsting about their own hot-button chore items, like mowing the lawn, or having a clear dining room table. And, universal truth is, the only person I can change is me. So I took back the dishes. And I found my Dishes Zen.
I'm an engineering student, and as such have moved quite a bit between co-ops, internships, and school. Because my moves happen three times a year and my moves are typically over 400 miles, I have never actually moved into an apartment that I've seen beforehand — and I've lived in seven different apartments/shared houses. I'll admit, I went through some pretty crappy living arrangements because of this, but I have gradually learned how to make this experience better.
Here are some things I've learned to do when moving in blind…
The other day when my boyfriend was at work, I texted him to say "I'm exhausted and I just want to warn you that the dishes aren't done. I'll get to them tomorrow first thing."
His response: "I hate to tell you this, love, but you're an adult now. You can do the dishes whenever you want!"
My reaction in my mind: "Not true. I have a responsibility to my roommate to maintain this house in the way that I would want to live in it." Then I caught myself and thought for a minute. Does living with your partner mean that maybe, just maybe, the entire home is now under our shared dominion? And that, within reason, I can decide what gets done when, just like he can? I still wasn't sure.
Attention young Offbeat Homies: At some point, you will cease to live with your parents or in a dorm room, and will very likely live in a cheap apartment, quite possibly with roommates. I hit this particular milestone my Junior year of college, and here's what it taught me…
There are a lot of posts on Offbeat Home about cohabiting in an apartment or house; however, I don't think I've seen anything covering living and sleeping in the same room as a roommate you didn't know until a week prior to moving in! Here are the four rules my roommate and I follow to keep the peace.
We're buying our first home and have offered to let a friend and her son move in with us and "pay rent" (part of the mortage + utilities). He thinks our friend should be paying more than half because she's taking more space, my suggestion was that all of the adults pay an equal amount. So, homies, how have you worked out splitting the costs between roommates in such a situation before?