Category Archive

Families

Our sister site Offbeat Mama launched in 2009, became Offbeat Families in 2012, and was merged into Offbeat Home & Life in 2015. This archive contains all the posts ever published on those sites! We believe that while children change your life forever, being around kids doesn’t necessitate abandoning your identity. We believe in supporting and inspiring parents and caregivers who are moving beyond mainstream visions of parenting. We welcome anyone who’s interested in families, whether you’re pre-parental, in the process of becoming a parent, or choosing to live childfree.

My mother walked out of my life and never looked back: How to move on from parental abandonment

My mother walked out of my life and never looked back: How to move on from parental abandonment

I always get irrationally angry when people post pictures on Facebook with captions like, “A Mother’s Love is Forever,” and “Nothing Is Stronger Than The Bond Between Mother and Child.” What a bunch of bullshit. My mother walked out of my life years ago, and never looked back. So how do I deal with it? How does one cope with the loss of a parent not to death, but by parental abandonment? Like this…

In praise of the “Weird Moms”

We’ve all seen it: tenacious and spectacular women — those whom Kerouac would call The Mad Ones — rounding their edges after their children were born, getting lost in chasing small beasts around with rags and screaming their burning questions about the status of little hands; are they washed or not?! Those of us who occupy the role of Weird Mom have a very difficult job cut out for us…

We are the future: Our post-millenial, Pagan, LGBT, polyamorous family

This is what our healthy family looks like, our core family that is. It Extends, because that little boy there holding a mask over his head has never ever known what the rest of the country lives like. Add to that most of us are gay, bi, or polyamorous. This means, when one of us has a child we have to definitely “redefine family.”

“You should wait to have kids”: How do you deal with the parenting naysayer

One thing I’ve been so curious about as a newlywed person is “baby advice” — and not the “when are you having a baby” question, but actually the exact opposite. My husband and I have had numerous family members (with children) tell us we should wait ten years for kids of our own. I’m wondering about how other Homies are dealing with the parenting naysayers. Are other couples are dealing with the shaming around becoming parents along with the pressure to procreate after getting married?

The Holidays are coming: We dare you to send this hilarious “holiday application form” to your family this year!

Each year, The Holiday Conversations in our extended family starts in mid-July, when our little unit begins strategizing with our in-laws, to get out ahead of the game. It’s preemptive damage control. Much like leaving a play-date en-masse, we like to present a united front when the parents-in-law begin sniffing around our holiday plans. Our plans for this year’s Thanksgiving were already solidified weeks ago, but I’d like to share it here in case anyone finds it useful. I’ve updated it for the 2015 calendar year…

7 ways smoking weed can make you a better parent

I live in Colorado, where Amendment 64 gave us the right to blaze up for pleasure in addition to medical reasons. That includes *gasp* caregivers of children. Sometimes known as parents. And we’re not alone. Marijuana is legal in some form or another in 23 states and the District of Columbia. With weed as popular as it’s ever been, it’s easy to understand that a vast amount of these users are mothers and fathers. Here are some of the many reasons parents are lighting up…

pregnancy truths

My vagina physically aches & 5 other unedited, unfiltered, shitty pregnancy truths

In an effort to self-disclose and move toward a pregnancy culture where we can share our shit and bare our souls beyond the excitement of impending motherhood, I give you my current, unedited, unfiltered, list of pregnancy truths.

Learning to be loved by my mother-in-law

My husband and I have been married for a couple of years now and we recently decided to “take the plunge” into the waters of living with his mom, my mother-in-law. When I instantly found myself uncomfortable and lost in this new living space, I was surprised and confused by my feelings. I was embarrassingly confused and mad at myself for acting unintentionally cold to her — unable to find the words to explain to my husband as to why I was feeling this way, because I didn’t even understand myself.