Blending work, home, and marriage: How to work with your spouse
I finally finished my PhD and found myself at a loose end. My husband Jamie was wrapping up his own project and he made a proposal: why not work on an iPad word game idea together? So in a week we had a working prototype and we thought hey, this could work; we can always quit if it doesn’t. That first week of working together gradually became months as our daily lives melded work, home, and marriage. Along the way I learned a few things, through trial and error, that made working with a spouse easier…
Keep a shopping list for clothes
My lack of fashion-seeking prowess has led to a wardrobe that, while totally me, has some major holes in it. Like the hippie skirt I love, but rarely wear because it’s so hard to match the colors with my tops. Or the shirt that’s too low-cut to wear without one very specific cami, which is usually in the laundry due to its popularity. You get the idea.
This morning, while putting away laundry, I had a baskets moment about my wardrobe situation…
My summer reading list: three books about America, and one about bridesicles
Ever since I figured out last year that no screentime for an hour before bed made it waaaay easier for me to fall asleep, I have been on a reading BINGE. Mostly fiction, mostly fun, and mostly AWESOME. This summer in particular I’ve been on a roll with some really great books, and figured I’d circle up with y’all to compare notes.
Oddly, three of the four books I’ve read recently have had “America” in the title, so evidently I’m on a patriotic theme. Come with me?
I was fat-shamed at an Afro-Centric Pregnancy Fair
The other day, I got fat-shamed. When you get fat-shamed often, like every time you turn on a television, it takes a lot to make an impact. My husband, Chris, and I went to our city’s second annual Afro-Centric Pregnancy Fair in Portland, Oregon. I had high hopes of being in a supportive environment of people who care about the unique challenges facing black women as they enter pregnancy, childbirth, and childbearing. I fantasized about talking with midwives, doulas, and new mothers about their amazing experiences and horror stories of hospitals, birth centers, and their living rooms. Instead, I got a major dressing down by a black doctor manning an information table for a clinic.
How do you pull off an awesome low-budget, gluten-free, soy-free, worry-free birthday party?
I feel like my husband deserves to have a wonderful birthday, where he doesn’t have to give a damn about worrying about what’s in his food. I figured if anyone would know about throwing a party for a nerd with dietary constrictions on a budget, the Offbeat Homies would know. So how do you pull off an awesome low-budget, gluten-free, soy-free, worry-free birthday party?
What is it like working at a sperm bank?
When my partner and I think about starting a family down the road, we know that as two women we will most likely choose to work with a sperm bank. I am positive that route makes the most sense for us and our future family, but I still can’t quite wrap my mind around the idea of a sperm bank. They seem so sci-fi!
Let’s geek out about going on a self-guided Pretty In Pink tour
I recently shot a wedding in LA and had the happy fortune of being able to stay with Megan (as in the Associate Publisher of the Empire) while in town. One night in the trip one of my all-time favorite movies Pretty in Pink came on today, and I mentioned that it would be OMG AMAZING if we could go on a tour of all the places in the movie. It turns out that’s pretty easy to do… so we did it.
Why I ditched the “American dream” and became a Park Ranger
I took my responsibility as a father and husband seriously, and I was so focused on making sure that the life I gave my family was better than the one I had growing up that I lost sight of something extremely important… Myself. So I abandoned the “American dream” once I got inspired to live MY dream. And it was all for one simple reason…