The U.S. military is regimented, strict, and follows a standard protocol, and their approach to delivering babies is no different. When I found out I was pregnant, I was given a schedule of all my appointments until my due date. I was expected to be on time, and promptly follow all instructions, take my vitamins, get rest, drink water, etc. There would be adequate care, but no extras. No birthing pools, no midwives, no extra ultrasounds unless necessary. As a new military wife, and a first timer mama-to-be, I was in awe at the speed and efficiency that took place as I was shuffled in and out of my appointments.
As my due date drew closer, I proudly presented my “birth plan” to my Officer Doctor. He smiled at me, and tucked it into my file and made sure to give me his pre-canned speech about how “birth is unpredictable,” and described the point at which I would have my epidural. He told me that epidurals are standard protocol and that I was welcome to try, but the anesthsiologist would be on call. After all he had delivered “many babies and first time moms usually need some help anyways so it is easier to just follow the procedure.” After voicing my concerns I left the office in tears of frustration… I felt condemned to a standardized birth.
The day of delivery was like any other Sunday. Monday was my due date and I was becoming increasingly worried at the thought of my pre-scheduled induction date, which was also standard procedure.
I’m an active person and don’t do well sitting still for long, even when nine months pregnant. I went to Costco and the shopping mall, added a few more cute outfits to my droves of tiny clothes in the nursery. Finally my husband and I polished off the evening with my ritual 1/2 mile walk with our dogs. I laid down to go to sleep and discovered I couldn’t lay down! I tried and tried but it hurt! I told my hubby I was going to get up and that I think this was it! I labored at home from about 9:00pm until around 5:00am when I figured I was getting a bit too uncomfortable to sit in the car and ride to the hospital.
Upon arrival the nurse sleepily directed us to a room. My husband, slightly nervous by now as I think he could sense the time was drawing near, asked her “Where’s the doctor?” “I have to check first and see if he even needs to come in” was her reply. As she checked I watched between my legs as her eyes grew wide and all sleepiness left her face… I was at 9.5cm dilated and ready to go! Oh gosh, I thought, I guess we were going to stay.
As soon as we got into the delivery room my water broke. By then Officer Doctor had come rushing into the room. He checked again and said I was welcome to push when I felt ready. As I labored freely he supervised my pushing from a variety of positions, even getting down on his hand and knees to keep an eye on things. The poor guy actually looked relieved to stop chasing me around the room when I finally grew a bit tired and said I wanted to try laying down for a minute.
I started to push, but I didn’t feel as though I was “pushing right” — I didn’t feel like much was happening. I saw the doctor putting on a face shield and gowns, and galoshas for all I knew! I kept pushing and though I didn’t think it was working, everyone grew excited as Kole Anthony Brown made it into the world completely without any medication or assistance. After hearing that first loud cry, I was startled to also hear clapping and cheering from the eight nurses who were also in the room! As Kole was placed on my chest, I remember feeling how warm he was on my skin. I had been in such a rush I soon realized I wasn’t even in a gown — just the tank top I had worn to the hospital. So much for standard protocol! I snuggled up with my husband and baby and realized I had done it.
Later during my stay in the hospital I found that I had become somewhat of a celebrity. Several of the lower ranking nurses had never seen an unmedicated birth before! Officer Doctor came in to check on me looking slightly ashamed: he admitted to not thinking I could do it, and said he was honored that he had been able to share such a special birth with such a strong young woman — even if it didn’t follow protocol.
Rock on, mama!
Something to be said for showing up later rather than earlier? Congrats on having the kind of birth you wanted! Glad you didn’t have to fight for it once it was underway.
That’s a good observation. It was my intent to labor at home, actually the OB clinic had told me as long as my water haden’t broke and I didn’t see a cord come out etc. it was completely safe to labor at home until my contractions were close together. I encourage women to know “danger signs” and to labor as long as they feel comfortable doing so at home, once you get to the hospital it is so much more uncomfortable….at least in my experience.
Thank you so much! I had a very standard birth that I didnt get a say in for my first daughter (not a military wife at the time) and now that we are trying for number two and I am an Air Force wife, I keep hearing horror stories about delivering at the base hospital. I’ve already told my husband I am having a home birth whether he likes it or not.
Thank you for posting this! As a new military wife, which is trying to get pregnant, looking at how the prenatal and delivery works honestly scared me. I am so glad you made the system work for you.
Phew, this story gave me chills! So glad you have a great birth to look back on.
My breath was baited the entire time, too! Ohhh protocol… all the interventions to give a sense of control to a process Officer Dr. even called “unpredictable.” Good for you, mama.
Congrats! What a wonderful birth story! My dad was in the navy when I was born in 1978, and my mom has plenty of stories from that experience. At that time the policy was no epidurals, for anyone. If you had a C-section you got general anesthesia, otherwise you were on your own. Certainly the military isn’t known for flexibility!
I don’t know how to feel about this post. Being a navy wife who is trying for a second under tricare prime… it scares me. I would be a VBAC candidate because my first was c-section due to pre-e. This makes me feel like Military doctors would never give me a chance to show that I could have a natural birth.
Though, it is a beautiful story. Maybe I should take it as a way to beat the odds. I wasn’t given the option last ime to birth at home. I was rushed to the hospital right away due to high bp. I was 38 weeks so they had no problem inducing me.
I’m sure birthing at home makes all the difference.
I just wanted to wish you luck. I’m also a VBAC candidate due next month in Tricare Prime. Thankfully we live in Florida where law states that they must offer midwife care if they offer OB care, so I’m able to see a midwife off-base (also our base doesn’t have a hospital).
The most encouraging thing I’ve ever heard uttered at my midwife’s office was “They can’t MAKE you have a c-section.”
I would suggest you simply educate yourself and attempt to get to know yourself and your pregnancy as much as possible. Ask questions, keep up with your chart. Make informed decisions. Also, a good doula never hurts if you can afford it.
Best of luck!
I had a doula, and took Bradley Classes with my daughter’s pregnancy. Something I will be repeating next time around.
I had a birth plan, and everything. It was going to all be a glorious natural birth, starting at home and ending in a whirlpool, everyone was going to be silent as my daughter was born so that the first thing she heard would be her parents. We weren’t going to cut the cord until it stopped pulsating… It all went out the window the day my health had reached critical.
Wow, Florida! That’s a great law. I’m currently working on my first baby in Charlottesville, VA, so we are on Tricare Prime Remote. I am trying to get a referral/authorization from my PCM to have my OB care and birth at the hospital that has midwives and labor pools so I can go natural with the help of water emersion (unfortunately even they make you get out of the water for the actual birth!). It seems like I might be in for five hundred phone calls, but luckily (glass-half-full) I am part of the 27% of unemployed military spouses so I have plenty of time to play the Squeaky Wheel! Also strongly considering a doula. Good luck to all the military mamas seeking natural births!
You showed them! Way to go, Mama! I’m a new Military wife as well, and part of our decision to have a baby when we did (last May) was that since we’re stationed in Germany we could use the German healthcare system for prenatal care and a German hospital for delivery. I really did not want to deliver in an American hospital! For the Germans, Unmedicated is the NORM not the exception, and everything on my “No intervention” birthplan was standard procedure! We got the perfect midwife-assisted hospital birth we wanted and didn’t have to pay a cent for it!
That’s incredible! I’m a big fan of the Ina May Gaskin movement and in many of her statements she mentions how other countries birth cultures are so much different than the United States….what an incredible experience it must have been to be part of a different coutries birth culture!
Congrats! It sounds glorious. 😀
My mother was in the military when my younger siblings were born. She birthed my brother at Walter Reed (Reid?) after my dad had open heart surgery, where she got an epidural for the first time. Apparently when she saw the doctor for her post-natal back on base in England, she mentioned she had an epidural. Her doctor replied, “Tell no one! We can’t do that here.”
Many years later, while I (non-military) and my friend (military wife) were both pregnant, she had a pretty rough birth in the hospital on fort. She was actually permitted a midwife, but nothing else went as planned.
Congrats, and thanks so much for sharing this. I’m due in about a month, and reading birth stories like it’s my job. Lately I’ve been reading so many “nothing went according to plan” stories that I’ve begun to feel really discouraged about trying for an unmedicated birth as a first time mama.
It’s good to know that while it’s still wildly unpredictable that it’s also achievable.
Sharon, like you I was afraid I wouldn’t get the unmedicated birth I wanted as a new mom. Well, let me tell you, NOTHING went according to plan, I broke down and asked for the drugs because contractions were so bad, and as soon as I got back into bed so they could hook up the monitors again I had the sudden urge to push. My baby boy came flying out before the doctor could even get to the hospital, and I got the unmedicated birth I wanted 😉 Everything happened so fast the anesthesiologist arrived when the doctor should have been there.
Definitely plan for the unexpected, because anything can happen, but it is totally possible to get the birth you had hoped for 🙂
As an active duty member (yes you read it right, I the pregnant female and the active duty one in this house) I will say this about military maternity care, no one can force you to use it. You have options. You may have to pay a bit have to for off base care under tricare standard or use your military OB for most of your prenatal care and then just happen to away from base when the times comes . . . some things are worth it. Refuse to let the system scare you into thinking there are no options.
I just have to add that I have had 2 babies in militar care, one at an Army hospital and one at an Air Force hospital and I had midwifes both times. In fact I never saw an OB for either pregnancy or birth. I chose to have an epidural but I wasn’t pressured to have one and I know with my Air Force delivery the lady next door was going natural as her yelling and moaning during labor kept me awake! 😉
Congrats Mama! My husband is Army and I am VERY VERY thankful that tricare is fully funding my choice to go to the midwife birth center off post even if it means we have to drive 4 hours for our appointments…
Can you tell us how you went about getting this covered?
I am a Navy wife and have only ever seen civilian OBs and gone to civilian hospitals. We live in Virginia so it isn’t from lack of military hopitals or MTFs, but I chose to be on Tricare Standard. The cost for all of the OB appointments – we were covered at 100% of the allowable charges. The cost of having 3 c-sections (not elective!): about $50 per child. I was hospitalized in my second and third pregnancy’s – once in ICU – charges billed – $18,000.00 – we paid right around $120. I am so glad to read that your birth went more as you had planned than originally anticipated! I just wanted to share my experience bc it always amazes me that more women eitther don’t know about Tricare Standards OB care or choose not to use it, and yet are concerned about what kind of experience they will have at a military facility. Please do your research military mamas – you have two great (Prrime & Standard) and affordable (nearly free to you) options for bringing those babies into the world!
I am a Navy wife and have only ever seen civilian OBs and gone to civilian hospitals. We live in Virginia so it isn’t from lack of military hopitals or MTFs, but I chose to be on Tricare Standard. The cost for all of the OB appointments – we were covered at 100% of the allowable charges. The cost of having 3 c-sections (not elective!): about $50 per child. I was hospitalized in my second and third pregnancy’s – once in ICU – charges billed – $18,000.00 – we paid right around $120. I am so glad to read that your birth went more as you had planned than originally anticipated! I just wanted to share my experience bc it always amazes me that more women either don’t know about Tricare Standard OB care or choose not to use it, and yet are concerned about what kind of experience they will have at a military facility. Please do your research military mamas – you have two great (Prime & Standard) and affordable (nearly free to you) options for bringing those babies into the world!
Go Mama!
Aw, Yay You. Congratulations!
I am the mother of four, and the youngest is 9 weeks old. All of my children have been born at Naval Hospitals- and it was a wonderful experience each time. The Officer Doctor WAS right- birth is extremely unpredictable- but with each labor and delivery my wishes were adhered to. The corpsmen and nurses (two different beasts, I assure you) were wonderful, and the on call OB was phenomenal. The reason my nurse-midwife didn’t deliver? She was off duty after a 36 hour ‘on call.’ I was perfectly happy with someone who I had seen once or twice delivering my son vice the nurse-midwife- who I loved- who was exhausted.
We chose to use Military Health Care for our OB needs, although it was far from the only choice. It was a decision that both my husband and I made with our first pregnancy, and one that we have been so very happy with. The care is not substandard. Your birth plan can easily be refused in the civilian world as a birth plan can be refused in the military world. And yes, the military IS regimented (it’s supposed to be!) but it worked for me, and it worked well. I couldn’t have asked for better care for myself, or for my children.
That said, the choice to deliver at an MTF (military treatment facility) is the decision of the mother and father. It is very simple to change to civilian providers in most cases- unless the only medical facility available to you is the MTF. Your primary care physician (the person who sent you to OB when you had a positive pregnancy test) should have been able to discuss with you the options, as should any of the Tricare representatives.
To those that are facing their first interaction with a military OB clinic, I ask you to keep an open mind. Regimented they might be at times, but regimented isn’t necessarily a bad thing. From personal experience, I can tell you that none of the regimented actions that are used in the military are without reason, and even a civilian hospital has it’s policies and procedures.
Congratulations on the birth of your child!
Thanks everyone for your kind words! Also thanks off beat mama for being so kind as to post my story. I love the idea of “getting it out” I love hearing other women’s stories almost as much as sharing my own. If anyone ever has any questions for me etc. feel free to email. I think each hospital is just run differently, I think some protocols are branch wide ie Air Force, Army, Navy etc. and then I think each base hospital commander or lead OB officer probably helps establish how patients are treated at a particular base. Just like civilian world OB’s I think there is a wide range of attitudes and methods. I am also a member of Tricare Prime and since my base has a hospital, off base care from a mid wife wasn’t an option that was offered to me that would be covered by tricare so I had to make the best of dealing with dear Office Dr. :)…just as follow up when I went back to get my birth control he asked me “are you sure you don’t want to try for another here in a few months? I’ll do your delivery :)”
So glad this worked out for this Mama! Truly laboring so long at home was the key to success in this story — Tricare Prime would not allow me to use anything but an OBGYN for my maternity care, so I switched to Tricare Standard and chose a hospital-birthing midwife. Maternity is still covered nearly 100%, I think I paid $50 to my Midwife out of pocket, and about $27 to the hosp for 2 nights after the birth. There ARE options!! But you do have to research & fight 🙂