My best friend and her kids might come live with us — any advice on creating a non-biological family?
My best friend is a single mom with two kiddos who are my godchildren/niece and nephew. Since her divorce, she’s been living with her parents in a pretty cramped living situation in our hometown. She left college when she got married, and even living with parents, childcare costs have prevented her from going back to school for more than a class at a time and sometimes not at all. She’s been struggling even more financially recently, and my husband and I have been talking more and more about offering that she come and live with us for a bit to focus on school.
This shouldn’t be so weird and scary: thoughts on miscarriage
Imaginary woman, you are part of a long line of women who have been through this. You are not alone. I hope you have friends who will talk to you about even the ickiest parts. But even if you don’t, or even if they’re all asleep right now, you’re not alone.
Open thread: do you ever catch yourself turning into one of your parents and like it?
I spent a lot of time as a teenager wondering if my mom was really happy. How could she be, I wondered, working a thankless job as a teacher, married to a man who worked incessantly, and dealing with two kids who were hell? She never stopped moving — she would wake up at 4AM to work out before her day began, and then go through her daily motions. How could anyone be happy with that?
Why I’m not letting tragedies stop me from having kids
My thoughts turned to my friend at work who had given birth that day, and her baby who would always share a birthday with this tragedy. I thought of my other friend who is planning on welcoming twins into this world in October and taking the rest of the school year off to be with them. I thought of my childhood best friend whose daughter is almost a year old. And I thought, I am so lucky to be childfree. How do you deal with questions from a young child about why and what happened when these tragedies inevitably take place? I wasn’t even sure what I would tell my high school students in class the next day.
How the Wall Street Journal took a giant dump on women
You’ve heard about blogging conferences and events, right? Basically, a huge group of bloggers get together in a pre-determined location to do what people do at work conferences — network, hang out, and learn. Or, that’s what I’ve always assumed happens at work conferences, but according to this piece published by the Wall Street Journal, the only thing that happens when you gather a large group of mothers who blog together is a whole bunch of selfies and mini bar raiding.
How can I ask non-intrusive family planning questions?
Before, I didn’t get it. I didn’t think it was a big deal to ask if or when a couple was having kids. I didn’t realize the impact that merely being asked questions along these lines can have on someone dealing with personal decisions. I’ve actually apologized to a couple people for my past ignorance. But now I have a new problem: since these questions are off limits, I have no idea what to say!
“Don’t Think of Ugly People”: how parenting advice has changed
Ever feel constantly inundated with tips and tricks for raising kids? WELL, it turns out there’s a reason for that: sharing parenting tips is just part of what humans do. This piece from The Atlantic compares and contrasts parenting advice from today (don’t let your kids see a screen until they’re two!) to parenting advice from the 1900s (“Pregnant mothers should avoid thinking of ugly people, or those marked by any deformity or disease; avoid injury, fright and disease of any kind.”) and examines why parents are so hung up on all that information in the first place.
My wife experienced the death of a student as only a teacher can
My wife is an early childhood and special educator. She works with young students, most of whom are the same age or younger than our youngest daughter. One of those students, one whom she’s championed, advocated for, and supported for almost two years, passed away. The news, and the resulting heartache, are things she never could have prepared for, steeled herself to. The loss of this student has hit her profoundly.