Category Archive

Families

Our sister site Offbeat Mama launched in 2009, became Offbeat Families in 2012, and was merged into Offbeat Home & Life in 2015. This archive contains all the posts ever published on those sites! We believe that while children change your life forever, being around kids doesn’t necessitate abandoning your identity. We believe in supporting and inspiring parents and caregivers who are moving beyond mainstream visions of parenting. We welcome anyone who’s interested in families, whether you’re pre-parental, in the process of becoming a parent, or choosing to live childfree.

Non-religious, non-Santa Christmas books for kids

I’m wondering if anyone has recommendations for non-religious, non-Santa Christmas books for kids. We’re atheists, and we aren’t doing Santa either. I just found Little Blue Truck’s Christmas. In it, the truck delivers Christmas trees to friends. It’s perfect for my two-year old. Anyone have other non-religious, non-Santa Christmas books that might be good for toddlers, preschoolers, and older kids too?

On being raised as a “small person” instead of being “treated like a child”

The idea that a child was a child and nothing more was never really perpetuated in my home. I never felt that there was a role that I was assigned to or an expectation that I had to meet. Growing up I began to see that my parents had a far more interesting approach to raising me than I realized. I wasn’t treated as a child growing up. I was treated like a person… a small person.

We’re not worried about our pit bulls being around our baby

The most persisting hot topic in my life as a mom is the fact that we have two Pit bulls. Well, an American Staffordshire Terrier and a Pit mix extraordinaire to be exact, but really we all know regardless of what I call them they’ll always just be Pit bulls. Are you nervous? Oh please don’t be!

Friends are the family we get to choose for ourselves

There are a couple of clichés that get that way because they’re so damn true. Some that have been true for our family of two is that friends are the gods’ apology for families, friends are the family we choose for ourselves, and friends walk in when everyone else walks out. My patchwork quilt of family is mostly made of beautiful friendships, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Different last names: How do I make our family sound more coherent?

I am a divorced woman who will be getting re-married soon. Part of me wants my daughter and I to have the same name, but I also don’t want to be stuck with the name that is associated with such a crap time in my life. Since I can’t change our child’s last name to that of my husband, is there anything that I can do to make our new family sound more coherent?

Honest time: What no one tells you about having a kid

I had it all figured out. I’d read the books and the blogs, from the humorous to the medical. Talked to parents. Formed opinions. I knew exactly what I wanted to do. Then, I had a child, and it all went to hell. “How is the… adjustment going?” One mom friend asked, with a knowing look on her face. “I remember thinking it was hell on earth,” the dad of a two-year-old told me. “Welcome to the secret society,” my aunt said, “You can’t understand it until you’ve done it.” I may not have been able to understand, but I would have liked a warning!

Dealing with difficult in-laws the grown-up way

What are you supposed to do when you can’t stand your in-laws? I needed to learn techniques to help me deal with mine in a kind and considerate manner, without exploding with internalized stress. For me, the following things have helped…

Growing up and letting go of obsolete relationship dynamics

My sister is amazing with people, confident and outgoing and extraordinarily empathetic. And me? Well, I was the best at logistics. I always had two sets of lunch money in case my sister forgot hers (which was often useful), and contingency plans for every situation. As we grew up and left home the relationship dynamic stayed the same. Then, last year, we had a family crisis, and I realized that the dynamic had shifted, and I needed to shift as well.