Put the fun back in funeral: I threw a surprise birthday funeral for my metamour
Kitty is my metamour — Chris’s other partner — and a passionate devotee to all things dark, grotesque, and twisted. As her birthday falls on New Year’s Eve, so she very rarely has a birthday party of her own. I decided to remedy this with a surprise birthday party (no, a surprise birthday funeral!) two weeks before her birthday to really catch her off-guard. Here’s how we pulled it off…
Are poly and sex-positive people really “obsessed with sex”?
Many (if not most of us) who are polyamorous, swinger, or in any kind of open relationships, have been told we are “obsessed with sex.” But are we really? Okay, sure… there are absolutely people out there who would be obsessed with sex. They even have therapy sessions, which for anyone truly obsessed with sex — that is a wonderful thing. But many of us are not dictionary-definition obsessed with sexual pleasures. We’re simply open — open-minded, open sexually, and sexually positive. Is that really a bad thing? Apparently to some people, yes, yes it is.
Pregnant and polyamorous: On dating a potential lover while pregnant by your husband
My husband and I were a month into trying to conceive when we I peed on that stick and got the great news that I was pregnant. As we sat looking at the third positive pregnancy test, I excitedly and nervously thought about who we would tell first: parents, siblings, in-laws, and that fantastic man that I started dating… I debated and decided that being pregnant would not be a barrier to pursuing him as a lover, my husband concurred — but I wasn’t sure if he would feel the same.
We are the future: Our post-millenial, Pagan, LGBT, polyamorous family
This is what our healthy family looks like, our core family that is. It Extends, because that little boy there holding a mask over his head has never ever known what the rest of the country lives like. Add to that most of us are gay, bi, or polyamorous. This means, when one of us has a child we have to definitely “redefine family.”
“He’s not my husband, he’s her husband, but we all really want a loan together”: Life as a long-term polyamorist
I have been following the recent stories on polyamorous relationships, both on Offbeat Home and elsewhere, and saying a silent “hallelujah.” I’ve been in a polyfidelitous triad (like a marriage but with three people) for thirteen years, but have never found the strength or the venue to start a larger conversation about long-term polyamorist relationships. But given how long the three of us have been together, I feel like I can offer some useful tidbits of advice and some observations on living a life that exists on the fringes but still in the mainstream.
Monogamists say the darndest things: The top 4 responses to coming-out as a throuple
The majority of people we’ve come out as a throuple to have said hurtful things, effectively shutting down what might’ve been a constructive conversation. Some of the rudeness stemmed from ignorance, and some of it was actually well-meaning. I hold strongly that these reactions are mostly made in panic, shock, or confusion. I would like to go over them. I hope that people who have been here can find some solace in this, and that — if any of you are ever on the receiving end of a coming-out — this entry prepares you to hear as openly as you can.
My family includes my “platonic wife”
Kira, the platonic wife in question, is sapiosexual, and we have known each other for about seven years; she and her heterosexual husband have been married for about two years. So why “platonic wife” instead of “best friend” or “really close friend”? Really it comes down to the fact that I consider her as important and as “legitimate” of a relationship as my relationships with my husband and partner.
How scheduling saves our super-busy, polyamorous, multi-household family
Sharing lives can get messy, emotional, complicated, and exhilarating (and sometimes all in 20 minutes). It’s extraordinarily nice to, once a week, have a time set aside for the exclusive purpose of figuring out the logistics.