How can I support my partner during a custody case?
What can I do to support my partner (a single father) while he is in the middle of a custody case for his child? I am not a legal stepmother to this child, though I am a part of his every day life and love him with every bit of my heart. I am not getting involved in the legal aspect of things, as it is not my place, but I am completely at a loss as to what I can do to support my partner and this beautiful child, and our little family unit we’ve created.
How can we transition step-children and half-siblings into a unified family?
I married a wonderful fella and his two daughters last June. We both feel like the four of us are doing fairly well with the transitions, and now it looks like we’re adding to our family in October. The girls knew we hoped to, which meant that they were not surprised when we told them. They weren’t enthusiastic, either. I’m not expecting them to be, at least not yet, but I am curious about how best to proceed.
How can we share our values and views with my step-kids without insulting their other home?
I am an offbeat stepmama to two beautiful stepsons with different mothers, ages nine and one-and-a-half. In their other homes, they live relatively healthy, active lives and they are well looked after and cared for in conventional ways. They have conventional toys, are socialized according to gender (with an emphasis on heterosexuality), and are educated about nutrition using common standards.
It turns out I wear offbeat step-mama-hood well
Last year, I did something very terrifying: I began dating a man with a two-and-a-half-year-old daughter. Naturally, one doesn’t spend a lot of thought on “the other woman” on the very first date with a single parent. But as our conversations deepened and our relationship evolved in that first month, I found that I was thinking about my boyfriend’s daughter an awful lot.
It took me twelve years to recognize my step-father as my Dad — and I wish it had happened a lot sooner
Since I’ve spent just under half of my life as a child of a single parent, I never thought I’d be able to pinpoint the exact day I finally got a Dad of my own. I grew up with my Mom, two brothers, and my (maternal) Grandma. I had a few male role models throughout my childhood — mostly family members like my Uncle, Grandpa, and my younger brother’s dad — but they came and went without trouble and I wasn’t too concerned with why they didn’t stick around. After all, they weren’t my father — they had their own lives and their own things to do… which didn’t include raising me.
How can we make sure my step-daughter feels comfortable with our future children?
I have a step-daughter and am worried she may feel jealousy or negativity toward any children her dad and I have in the future. I also don’t want our children to resent her. I’ve searched all over parenting and family forums and I’m not getting a lot — I’ve found plenty of typical sibling rivalry stories and advice, or stories from adopted/foster children who resented their parents’ birth children. Unfortunately, I can’t seem to find anything about step/half sibling issues.
My step-mom stepped in after my mom died and helped me find my life again
I never expected to call anyone my step-mom. To have a step-mom means your dad got divorced and he remarried or his wife died. In my case, it was the latter. My mom died when I was nineteen, meaning that my dad would likely remarry at some point. About two years after my mom’s death he met a woman who would become my step-mom. Two years may sound like a long time, but in “grief time” it might as well have been two months. Is anybody truly ever ready to accept the person who might try to replace her mom?
The ups and downs of step-and-biological parenting in tandem
Eight years ago I became a stepmother to two kids. We share their care with their biological mother — they’re half with us, half with her. At the time, my step-son was eight and my step-daughter was four. Step-parenting has by turns been the most awesome and the hardest shit I’ve done in my life — it is second only to having my “own” child. Here are a few of my positive (and negative) experiences.