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The kind of questions my husband and I get are totally different. People ask him, "Are you ready to lose your freedom?" while people ask me, "Are you ready to be a mother?" Maybe it's just the way these jokes and comments and questions stacked up, but it doesn't feel like I can just "lighten up." Any confidence I had in myself to ignore what people were saying quickly dissipated, and one of my newest and biggest worries was born.

As I grow in my relationship with my husband and future family, what's going to happen to my identity?

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How can you best relate to friends with imprisoned loved ones?

When I found out what had happened I knew my friend would be devastated. Her partner will be in jail for years, not weeks. I have messaged her a few times indicating I would love to see her, and we are planning a catch up in the next few weeks. My conundrum is this: Do we talk about her partner? Do I pass on my best wishes? Do I just ask if she is okay? What is the best way to show my support to her, and by proxy, her imprisoned partner.